Asking for Help on Yom Kippur? (Derashah, Yom Kippur 5777)

Some of you may remember my 2012 blog post, "G-d, please bring me back my son". This is directly related. 

The Ari’s Prayer

Rabbi Moshe Alshich was one of the leading sages of the city of Tzefat in the middle of the 16^th century. Ordained by Rabbi Yosef Karo, he was expert in Tanach, Talmud, Halachah and Kabbalah. But as Rabbi Chaim Vital reported, Rabbi Alshich’s son converted to Islam. Distraught, Rabbi Alshich went to Rabbi Yitzchak Luria, the Ari z”l for help. The Ari gave him a text to recite in the daily amidah:

May it be Your will, HaShem, our Gd and Gd of our ancestors, that You tunnel beneath Your throne of honour[1] and receive the repentance of so-and-so, for Your right hand is extended to receive those who return. Blessed are You, Gd, who desires repentance.

In ensuing generations, the Ari’s appeal to Gd for intervention appeared in multiple, increasingly stronger texts. In the 18^th century, Rav Zvi Hirsch Kaidanover added, “יהופך לבבם לעשות רצונך בלבב שלם”, May You cause their hearts to be reversed, to perform Your will wholeheartedly. Gd, make them repent!

The question

While the Ari z”l perhaps pioneered this prayer, he was far from the first to suggest praying for Gd to help people follow a proper path:

·         Dovid haMelech davened: “May HaShem, Gd of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yisrael, remember eternally my dedication of materials for the Beit haMikdash, and therefore turn the nation’s hearts to Him. May He give my son Shlomo a complete heart to guard His mitzvot and laws.[2]”

·         And the Talmud speaks of praying for Gd’s assistance with teshuvah; think of the classic story of the local gang who tormented Rabbi Meir. Rabbi Meir davened for them to die; his wife, Beruriah, davened that they repent.[3] And the conclusion seems to follow Beruriah’s view.

In truth, praying for someone to return is a dangerous game; it can easily feed into facile self-righteousness. Who am I to decide that someone needs teshuvah - and needs help doing teshuvah? And maybe they don’t want my help at all; maybe they view me as a busybody! But the idea is there, with a solid pedigree in Dovid, Beruriah and the Ari z”l. It requires cautious humility, but we are indeed empowered to ask Gd to help others repent.[4]

We could ask many questions about the Ari’s prayer, and the examples of Dovid haMelech and Beruriah, but here’s one fundamental problem: How can we ask Gd to help with teshuvah? We are taught that Gd will not seek to control יראת שמים, that emotional awe which is so often the driving force impelling our return![5] How can we expect Gd to break that rule?

I am far from the first to ask this question. The Maharsha[6] offered one suggestion, and the Ben Ish Chai[7] offered another.[8] But I would like to suggest a third approach, which is important not only if we daven for others to repent, but also in davening for help with our own teshuvah process.

An answer from Eliyahu

In the middle of the era of the first Beit haMikdash, at the height of the reign of King Achav and Queen Izevel, at the apex of influence of the prophets of the Baal and Asherah over the Jewish people, Eliyahu haNavi issued an invitation for a showdown, a duel of dieties. In one corner, hundreds of prophets of idolatry; in the other, lonely Elijah. Both would attempt to summon fire from the heavens to consume their offering. At stake: The faith of a nation.

The priests of Baal batted first; they struggled mightily, they cried out and capered and cut themselves, while Eliyahu mocked them – and no fire came. At last afternoon arrived, and Eliyahu addressed Gd. He declared, “HaShem, Gd of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yisrael![9] Let it be known today that You are Gd in Israel, and I am Your servant, and all I have done has been at Your word. Answer me, Gd, answer me, and this nation will know that You are Gd -” And then he spoke fateful words, “For You have turned their hearts backward, ואתה הסבות את לבם אחורנית.” And at that, fire descended from the sky and consumed the totality of the offering – the animal, the wood, the stones of the altar, the dirt, even the water Eliyahu had poured over the altar.[10]

“For You have turned their hearts backward!” As explained by Rabbi Elazar and most classic commentators,[11] Eliyahu here launched an accusation at Gd: it’s Your fault that they sinned! You invested them with a yetzer hara driving them to sin, and You have failed to provide a counter-inspiration.

Long before this, Moshe accused Gd of setting up the Jews for their sin with the Golden Calf,[12] but Eliyahu went further than Moshe. Moshe only asked Gd to forgive the Jews; Eliyahu demanded that Gd act constructively, and provide the impetus which would lead to our national return.

This may be what permitted the Ari’s prayer for Divine help. Gd invested each of us with a set of desires – ego, insecurity, lust, greed, laziness, rebelliousness, and so on. Assuredly, there was good reason for doing this; those traits even work to our advantage, at times. But the decision to design each human baby anew with these traits brings with it Eliyahu’s charge – ואתה הסבות את לבם אחורנית, You have led them astray! We know You want us to repent and to do right, so please help us out. Don’t rob us of free will, but give us a sign, as You did at Har haKarmel, to help us see the truth. Or decrease the temptations with which we struggle. Help us.[13]

We lack the righteous track record of Eliyahu HaNavi, such that we could independently utter his intrepid demands with our mouths; blaming G-d is a popular sport, but Eliyahu’s righteous outrage seems a bit contrived on the lips of such willing participants in sin. Nonetheless, the Ari harnessed Eliyahu’s message and taught us that in this case we may use those words as well. It is legitimate and meaningful for us to daven to HaShem to balance things out, and to help those who have sinned to return.[14]

For ourselves

In the standard Yom Kippur davening, we already make use of Eliyahu’s approach for ourselves. At every amidah of Yom Kippur, after we perform viduy acknowledging our sins, we turn to HaShem with this request:

יהי רצון מלפניך, ד' אלקי ואלקי אבותי, שלא אחטא עוד

May it be Your will – HaShem, my Gd, and Gd of my ancestors, that I not sin again.

It’s Eliyahu’s principle at work: We are entitled to claim assistance from Gd.

·         We are obligated to perform cheshbon hanefesh, to account for our past deeds.

·         We are obligated to regret, to make amends, and to apologize.

·         We are obligated to devise methods by which we will replicate our good deeds and avoid replicating our transgressions in the future.

·         But at each step, we are within our rights to say to HaShem, אתה הסבות את לבם אחורנית. I am doing my best – but I need Your help to clean up the mess I’ve made.

And it’s an obligation to do so for others

We have seen two points: We are justified in turning to HaShem for help with our own teshuvah, and we are empowered to turn to HaShem for help with the teshuvah of others. But there is one more step we must take.

Rabbi Elazar Azikri was part of the Ari’s 16^th century circle. He compiled a book of mitzvot called Sefer Charedim, and in it he also addressed the idea of praying for others to repent – and he wrote,

כשם שחייב אדם להתפלל על עצמו כך חייב להתפלל על פושעי ישראל... שישובו בתשובה

Just as one must pray for himself, so one must pray for the sinners of Israel… to repent.[15]

What is the nature of this obligation? What obligates us to pray on behalf of the teshuvah of others?

·         One might suggest that it is a function of the mitzvah of Ahavas HaShem; we are commanded to increase love of Gd in the world.[16]

·         One might suggest that it’s an act of chesed; we hold doors for others, we give tzedakah, and we try to help others to repent.

·         One might suggest it’s part of the mitzvah of tochachah; we are to educate others so that they don’t sin, and we help them avoid sinning in other ways – like by davening for their return.

·         But we might look at it as a function of being a member of a community; it’s about ערבות, our mutual responsibility. My mitzvot are not complete until everyone’s mitzvot are complete – and so I must humbly ask Gd to help others to repent, too.

In a moment, we will stand as a community and commemorate our extended family – victims of the Shoah, victims of terror, and the fallen of the Machteret and the IDF. Individuals will recall immediate family members.

The main purpose is to daven and pledge tzedakah on behalf of those who have passed away, but we may also draw on their example. Kedoshim, many of whom acted heroically for others in the worst of situations. Soldiers who gave their lives to defend their brethren. Family members who raised, nurtured and protected their loved ones.

May we be inspired by their example:

·         to daven not only for our own teshuvah, but for the teshuvah of others.

·         To use the words of the Ari z”l, or to use our own words.

·         And to ask Hashem to be a partner in our own teshuvah, and in the teshuvah of our nation.

Eliyahu was correct – HaShem has had a part in our errors. But HaShem is צופה לרשע וחפץ בהצדקו, as we say in the piyut of וכל מאמינים, “He sees the wicked person, and desires his reform.” Or as some versions actually say, “וחפץ להצדיקו, Gd sees the wicked person and wishes to make him righteous.[17]” May this be the year when Gd acts on this wish, for us and for all around us. ד' חפץ למען צדקו, יגדיל תורה ויאדיר.

---

[1] See Yerushalmi Sanhedrin 10:2, re the teshuvah of Menasheh

[2] Divrei haYamim I 29:18-19, paraphrased

[3] Berachos 10a; and see Abba Chilkiyah’s wife in Taanis 23b, and Moshe Rabbeinu in Sotah 14a from Yeshayah 53:12

[4] For an opposing view for which there is no room in this derashah, see http://www.yeshiva.co/midrash/outershiur.asp?id=18551.

[5] Berachos 33b, among other sources

[6] Maharsha to Berachos 10a. Similarly, see Chazon Ish cited by R’ Yehudah Lavi ben David in Beit Hillel. http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pagefeed/hebrewbooks_org_50549_53.pdf

[7] Ben Ish Chayil Shabbat Shuvah 1

[8] I cite both in a shiur available on-line at http://www.yutorah.org/lectures/lecture.cfm/864496/

[9] It is interesting to note that Dovid, too, in his abovecited prayer for Gd to turn the hearts of the Jews toward Gd, invoked the Gd of “Avraham, Yitzchak and Yisrael”.

[10] Melachim I 18:36-38

[11] Berachot 31b; note Rav Saadia Gaon’s alternative approach, reading this in the manner of Dovid’s request, “Please turn their hearts backward [to You].” And see Mishneh Torah, Hilchot Teshuvah 6:3, Shemonah Perakim 8, and Daat Mikra to Melachim I 18:37.

[12] Berachos 32a

[13] As indeed Gd promised He would, in Yechezkel 36:26-27

[14] One may note a similar idea used to explain Gd’s hardening of Pharaoh’s heart against the makkos

[15] Sefer Chareidim, Mitzvot haTeluyot b’Eretz Yisrael 5. This is also seen in the version of the Ari’s tefillah presented in Tefillah l'Dovid, by R' Chaim Dovid Amar, talmid of the Or haChaim, 18^th century Morocco (http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=50549&st=&pgnum=53)

[16] Raavad contends that this is the basis for the mitzvah of aiding conversion to Judaism

[17] See Yechezkel 18:21-23, as noted in the Goldschmidt machzor

"G-d, please bring back my son"

[Note: My shiur on Rav Kook's "HaShofar", a poem which we discussed last week, is now on-line here.]

Rabbi Moshe Alshich's son left Judaism; the circumstances are not recorded, although someone has written on the Alshich's Wikipedia page that he was "taken" and he became Muslim. The Alshich asked the Ari z"l for help, and the Ari gave him a kabbalistic prayer to recite, for Gd to help his son return. As the story is told by the Ari z"l's main student, Rav Chaim Vital, the son returned to Judaism.

Of course, the idea of praying for others' repentance is basic to Judaism; we do it all the time, such as in the blessing in the amidah which asks Gd to bring us back in complete repentance. And yet, the idea of praying for an individual highlights what we are really doing: We are asking Gd to hijack people's hearts, to change their minds. [This is more troubling than asking Gd to hijack my own mind, in which case it is not truly an act of hijacking at all.]

This raises philosophical questions:
• What happened to Free Will?
• What happened to the talmudic dictum, "All is in the hands of Heaven, other than awe of Heaven"?
• Of what value is repentance which is not only catalyzed by, but actually performed by, Divine intervention?
• And a child of the modern age may well be offended: Who are you to judge others, and pray to Gd that they be reformed?

I intend to speak about this in a pre-Selichos shiur on the first night of Selichos; for now, the prayer itself appears below, as it appears in three editions with significant variations.


1. R' Chaim Vital, 16th century Tzefat, Shaar Ruach haKodesh, pg. 24b

יחוד א' להחזיר את הרשע בתשובה והוא להר״מ אלשיך זלה״ה על אודות בנו שנשתמד ולמד לו מורי זלה"ה שיכוין ליחוד הזה להשיבו בתשובה והועיל לו ושב לדת ישראל: כבר ידעת כי בברכת השיבנו אבינו לתורתך שבתפילת י״ח היא בבינה הנק׳ תשובה ולכן בהגיעך בברכה זו בתפלתך תאמר תפלה זו קודם החתימה: יהי רצון מלפניך ד' אלקינו ואלקי אבותינו שתחתור חתירה מתחת כסא כבודך ותקבל בתשובה את פב״פ כי ימינך פשוטה לקבל שבים בא״י הרוצה בתשובה

The first yichud is to return a wicked person in repentance. This was for Rav Moshe Alshich, regarding his son who had assimilated, and my master taught him to contemplate this yichud to return him in repentance. It was effective for him, and he returned to the religion of Israel.
You know that the blessing of "Return us, our Father, to Your Torah" in shemoneh esreih is in the emanation of Understanding, which is called Return, and so when you reach this blessing in your prayer, recite this prayer before the end: "May it be Your will, HaShem, our Gd and Gd of our ancestors, that You tunnel beneath Your throne of honour and receive the repentance of so-and-so, for Your right hand is extended to receive those who return. Blessed are You, Gd, who desires repentance."

2. R' Zvi Hirsh Kaidanover, 18th century Vilna, Kav haYashar 5

וזה יאות לכל בר ישראל להיות זוכה ומזכה לאחרים, ומכל שכן שצריך אדם להתפלל על רשעי הדור שיחזרו בתשובה, כדאיתא בגמרא בברכות בברוריה דביתהו דרבי מאיר שאמרה ״יתמו חטאים״ כתיב, ולא ׳חוטאים׳. על כן אסדר אני לפניך לכל איש ואשה לומר יהי רצון זה בברכת ״השיבנו אבינו לתורתך, וקרבנו מלכנו לעבודתך״, ויאמר: ״יהי רצון מלפניך ד׳ אלקינו ואלקי אבותינו שתחתור חתירה מתחת כסא כבודך לתשובת פלוני בן פלונית וכל העוברים על מצותיך, יהופך לבבם לעשות רצונך בלבב שלם, כי ימינך פשוטה לקבל שבים, והחזירנו בתשובה שלימה לפניך, בא״י הרוצה בתשובה״

This is good for every Jew, to earn merit and provide merit for others, and certainly one must pray for the wicked of the generation to repent, as is seen (Berachot 10a) that Beruriah, wife of R' Meir, said, "It is written, 'May sins end,' not 'May sinners end.'" Therefore, I will arrange for each man and woman to say this prayer in the blessing of, "Return us, our Father, to Your Torah, and bring us close, our King, to Your service."
He should say: May it be Your will, HaShem, our Gd and Gd of our ancestors, that You tunnel beneath Your throne of honour for the repentance of so-and-so and all who violate Your command. May their heart be reversed to perform Your will wholeheartedly, for Your right hand is extended to receive those who return. And return us with complete repentance before You. Blessed are You, Gd, who desires repentance.

3. R' Chaim Dovid Amar, 18th century Morocco, Tefillah l'Dovid, Hashiveinu #212, pg. 52a

כתב האר״י (שער היחודים דכ״ג ע״ג) מי שיש לו בן או אח או קרוב אחר ח״ו שהטה מדרך טובה לדרך רעה או שהלך לתרבות דעה, יתפלל בתפילת י״ח בברכה זו זה הנוסח, ואז מובטח שיהפוך לבו לטובה בעזה״י. וצריך להתפלל עכ״פ שלושים יום ערב ובקר וצהרים, ובפרט בימי אלול שאז הוא עת רצון, ומכ״ש על עצמו שצריך שיתפלל שיהפוך לבו לטובה. וז״ל: השיבנו אבינו לתורתך וקרבנו מלכנו לעבודתך והחזירנו בתשובה שלמה לפניך. יהי רצון מלפניך ד' אלקינו ואלקי אבותינו שתחתור חתירה מתחת כסא כבודך להחזיר בתשובה שלמה כל פושעי ישראל ובכללם תחזירני אני פב״פ ופב״פ בתשובה שלמה לפניך ד', כי ימינך ד' פשוטה לקבל שבים. ברוך אתה ד' הרוצה בתשובה.

The Ari wrote: "One who has a son or brother or other relative who has strayed from the good path to the bad or who is engaged in bad behaviour, Gd forbid, should pray this text in this blessing in shemoneh esreih. He can be certain that this will turn his heart for the good, with Gd's help. He must pray at least thirty days, evening and morning and afternoon, and especially during Elul, the time of desire. He certainly should pray thus for himself, that Gd turn his heart to the good.
This is the text: Return us, our Father, to Your Torah, and bring us close, our King, to Your service. And return us with complete repentance before You. May it be Your will, HaShem, our Gd and Gd of our ancestors, that You tunnel beneath Your throne of honour to bring back in complete repentance all of the sinners of Israel. Among them, return me, and so-and-so, with complete repentance before You, for Your right hand, Gd, is extended to receive those who return. Blessed are You, Gd, who desires repentance.

Michael Jordan and K'naan on Repentance

[Looks like Mashiach will have wireless - Israeli biblical park outfits donkeys with wireless routers]

"Failing is just an excuse for me to get better." – K'naan

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." – Michael Jordan

In my mind, these quotes stand apart from traditional Jewish approaches to repentance because they convey the following rather arrogant messages:

1. I need only work harder in order to get where I need to go.
Failure is not about moral weakness or a demonstration of a flawed character requiring introspection and reconstruction of the self, but only a practical, technical error or non-achievement of a goal.

2. I need not appeal to a higher authority, or another party at all, for aid. It's all in my hands.
Contrast this with the classic Jewish idea of appealing to Gd for aid against the inclination toward sin, and the need for the assistance of mentors and peers in creating the right environment and incentives for growth.

3. I have already perfected myself after past failures, and can reflect on my growth from the perspective of success.
What Torah-based writer will refer to himself as having righted his wrongs and succeeded? What Jewish Jordan would ever present himself as a finished product?

And yet, I love these lines; they sit in a file that is always open on my computer, and they inspire me throughout the month of Elul. I love that arrogance, the assertion that it really is in my hands.

It's almost like Elazar ben Durdaya's recognition regarding his own repentance (Avodah Zarah 17a), אין הדבר תלוי אלא בי, "It depends only upon me," but stronger.

It ain't Rav Kook, but it works for me.

Remember!

An Elul thought I'm writing up for this week's Toronto Torah:

I've been thinking about the ways we depend on viduy (our recounting of sin) to help us repent. The more I think about it, the more I think that viduy is insufficient. To me, based on my own experience and the experiences reported by others, a healthy drive for growth requires both negative and positive motivation, lo taaseh and aseh, avoiding sin and drawing closer to G-d.

Our need for the two halves is evident in two complementary mitzvot which summon us to remember the Beit haMikdash, to motivate us to rebuild it: Zecher l'Mikdash requires us to relive its splendour, and Zecher l'Churban obligates us to recall its destruction. Envisioning the glory of our past and recognizing the decline of our present, we are motivated to return to greatness in the immediate future.

The Jew approaching Rosh haShanah and Yom Kippur often performs a Zecher l'Churban for himself, counting sins and deficiencies and so recognizing the decline of the present. We klop al cheit, day after day. But where is our Zecher l'Mikdash? Do we dedicate time to recall our heights, to relive the glory days of our righteous relationship with G-d? Months we spent in yeshiva or seminary, years of training our children in mitzvot, the time we spent writing checks for tzedakah or tuition, learning with a chavruta, helping our spouses, volunteering for community organizations, taking care of our parents, these are our Mikdash!

As we approach the days of judgment of mercy, may we perform both the Zecher l'Churban and Zecher l'Mikdash for ourselves, and so be motivated to return to greatness in the coming year.

Yonah's Change of Heart

The following is my article from this week's Toronto Torah. It's a piece from a shiur I presented this week, in a series on Yonah; the shiur audio is available here.

Yonah flees from before G-d, seeking to evade his prophetic mission, and ultimately attempts to surrender his life rather than fulfill the responsibility assigned to him. This wayward prophet is swallowed by a fish, and - during the course of a three-day stay in the depths - experiences a change of heart. He composes a poetic prayer, and pleads for another opportunity to serve. Where before this man had sought escape, now he expressed a longing to draw close to his Creator. What inspired Yonah to alter his path?

One might suggest that Yonah was motivated by fear of impending death, or by the pain of life in the Piscine Hotel. However, this would ignore the passion of his prayer, in which Yonah spoke of remembering G-d and gazing upon His sacred sanctuary. Also, such an explanation would call into question Yonah’s sincerity, and therefore it would raise doubts as to why G-d granted the former prophet his wish. Why, then, did Yonah decide to serve G-d after all?

One possibility emerges from a dialogue between Moshe and HaShem on Har Sinai. As described in the gemara (Sanhedrin 111a), Moshe ascended to Heaven and found HaShem describing His patience in the Torah. Moshe contended that HaShem should be patient only with the righteous – to which HaShem replied that he would eventually come to see the worth of patience for the wicked. That day came with the sin of the Meraglim, when Moshe found himself pleading for Divine mercy for the rebellious Jewish nation.

As Yonah personally declared (Yonah 4:1-3), he had fled from before G-d because of a Moshe-like objection to Divine mercy. Commentators differ in their explanations for that objection, but all agree that Yonah contended that G-d should not apply mercy to the wicked of Nineveh. Perhaps this explains Yonah’s metamorphosis in the fish; like Moshe after the sin of the Meraglim, Yonah came to see the value of Divine mercy when he needed to plead for it himself.

Alternatively, Yonah’s own choice of words offers us another explanation. Yonah waxed rhapsodic (2:5), “I was exiled [נגרשתי] from before Your eyes.” This calls to mind two other exile experiences: “And He exiled [ויגרש] the man [Adam and Chavah, from Eden],” and Kayin’s charge to G-d, “You have exiled me [גרשת].” Adam and Chavah sinned, and then they hid and dissembled when G-d called for them and questioned them. Kayin sinned, and he attempted to hide the truth when G-d questioned him. Both were punished with exile, giving them the distance they had actually sought by hiding, and at that point they repented.

Perhaps the same is true for Yonah. Yonah sought to escape HaShem’s presence, and with his entry into the sea he was granted success. At this point, he was distant, and the flow of prophecy was cut off; Yonah 1, G-d 0. But at this moment the former prophet understood what his success truly meant – that he had erased his connection to the Divine. Like Adam and Chavah, like Kayin, he was now exiled. This frightened him, and he instantly repented his hard-won distance and sought his own return.

As the Vilna Gaon wrote (Aderet Eliyahu to Yonah 1:1), the story of Yonah is the story of every soul. We come to this world with a mission, and, at times, we wander from that mission and stray from the presence of the G-d who directs us. Yonah’s renewed appreciation of Divine mercy through his own experience of forgiveness can teach us to recognize and appreciate Divine kindness in our own lives. Yonah’s appreciation for the value of proximity to G-d can remind us to be similarly motivated to draw closer to our Creator. May we learn the lessons of the man who was swallowed by a fish, and so draw closer to the G-d who has charged us with missions of our own.

Rosh HaShanah vs. Yom Kippur (Dvar Torah, Rosh haShanah Day 2)

[If you are interested in my three shiurim on Rav Kook's Orot haTeshuvah, they are now on-line here, here and here. Note that the source sheets have quick translations of the cited lines from Orot, but the sheets also contain a link to the Hebrew edition of Orot haTeshuvah, available on-line here.]

Why do I need Rosh haShanah, when Yom Kippur is coming? Why bother sweating through Elul, Selichos and a Day of Judgment when I know that HaShem’s mercy is just one week distant, the product of a simple viduy, a single day’s fasting and a heartfelt neilah?

An answer may lie in the perplexing story of Dovid haMelech and Batsheva.

We know the basic details – Batsheva’s husband Uriah serves in Dovid’s army. Dovid becomes enamored of her and has her brought to the palace. She conceives, Dovid tells her husband Uriah to return home, Uriah refuses, Dovid sends Uriah to the front lines, Uriah is killed. Dovid declares חטאתי, I’ve sinned, and does teshuvah. Batsheva becomes Dovid’s wife, and mother of Shlomo haMelech.

We are also familiar with the declaration of R’ Yonasan, that Dovid did not sin. R’ Yonasan asserts that anyone who says Dovid sinned is mistaken, and the gemara clarifies that this doesn’t mean Dovid really sinned but it’s a mistake to say so – rather, it means that there was no sin. Uriah and Batsheva were divorced, and so on.

The problem is that R’ Yonasan’s predecessor, Rabban Shimon bar Yochai, declared that by doing as he did with Batsheva, Dovid taught future generations that teshuvah is possible, that one who has sinned can return to Gd. Tosafot even says that this is why Tanach records חטאם וקבלת תשובתם - he uses the term חטא to describe Dovid’s actions! What, didn’t Rabban Shimon bar Yochai and Tosafot get the memo? Dovid didn’t sin in the first place!

The explanation seems to be that this is, in fact, a machlokes between R’ Yonasan and Rabban Shimon bar Yochai about how to understand a single sentence in Shemuel Alef. The navi says, “ויהי דוד לכל דרכיו משכיל וד' עמו, Dovid displayed insight in his actions, and HaShem was with him.” R’ Yonasan looks at this pasuk and asks, אפשר חטא בא לידו ושכינה עמו? Can it be that Dovid sinned, and yet HaShem was with him?! Can’t be! Rather, we must conclude that Dovid did not sin with Batsheva. As R’ Yonasan sees it, HaShem would never have associated with Dovid, had he sinned with Batsheva. Teshuvah notwithstanding, one who would commit such an aveirah could never be linked with HaShem.

Rabban Shimon bar Yochai disagrees – Dovid taught us precisely this point, that one can return to HaShem, and HaShem will accept him back. Having sinned does not mean we will be held forever at a distance.

Rosh haShanah and Yom Kippur play out the same opposition regarding what it takes to draw close to Gd.

Rosh haShanah is יום הדין, the Day of Judgment, כי חק לישראל הוא, a day of חק, of stone-sculpted law, unchanging and unforgiving. Rosh haShanah is Moshe declaring, יקוב הדין את ההר, Let the law pierce the mountain! Rosh haShanah is Yonah declaring that mercy is an insult to the law! We don’t even bother with viduy and Ashamnu on Rosh haShanah, and we make only the barest mention of teshuvah. Instead, on Rosh haShanah we pass before HaShem כבני מרון, one by one, to face a trial in which there is no clemency. Within the Rosh haShanah vision, there is no room in the perimeter of Divinity for a person who has sinned and strayed, fallen short, missed the mark, whatever term we wish to place upon a display of human frailty. אם עונות תשמור י—ה ד' מי יעמוד, Rosh haShanah says that none deserve to survive for their sins. As far as Rosh haShanah is concerned, אפשר חטא בא לידו ושכינה עמו? It is impossible to believe that Dovid haMelech would have become king, patriarch of the eternal Jewish monarchy, progenitor and namesake of Mashiach, poet laureate of the Jewish nation, if he had sinned with Batsheva. Impossible.

And then Yom Kippur paints a competing vision, in which the Jew who has sinned is promised לפני ד' תטהרו, you shall be purified before HaShem. מה מקוה מטהר את הטמאים אף הקב"ה מטהר את ישראל, Just as the mikvah purifies the impure, so HaShem will purify us. Yom Kippur is the Divine response to Yonah, “How could I not have mercy?” Yom Kippur is a day of ובקשתם משם את ד' אלקיך ומצאת, of seeking HaShem and finding HaShem, of fasting and of korban and of apology, even after all of our sins. Yom Kippur is a day of using the anxiety generated by our sins to fuel our return to Gd, a day when, as Rav Kook said, עיקר יסוד השלימות שלו היא העריגה והחפץ הקבוע אל השלמות, that perfection is not in our deeds but in our desires, not in our perfect records but in our perfect longing for return. In the Yom Kippur vision, as Rabban Shimon bar Yochai contended, Dovid may well have crossed the line of legality – but he returned, and HaShem accepted him back, because HaShem will associate with us so long as we return.

We don’t pasken between R’ Yonasan and Rabban Shimon bar Yochai, with their conflicting versions of Dovid’s actions and of HaShem’s pledged affinity for him and for his line. And we don’t pasken between Rosh haShanah and Yom Kippur, with their conflicting expectations for keeping Divine company. Both claim our loyalty, and hold unique space in the halachic and hashkafic landscape.

In day to day life, our natural tendency is to style ourselves as Yom Kippur Jews, expecting that we will make mistakes and then repent. But, to address our initial question of why we mark Rosh haShanah’s judgment if we will be forgiven on Yom Kippur, we very much need a Rosh haShanah, a day to set the bar high and demand of ourselves that we hit the mark the first time, that we stretch beyond our preconceived limitations to reach for perfection, a day to motivate ourselves with a vision that moves and inspires us to greatness.

There will be plenty of time for Yom Kippur and its message of ex post facto redemption tonight, and during the next week. For now, though, for Shofar, for Musaf, for the remainder of the day, we ask of ourselves, we demand of ourselves, nothing less than perfection.

Like the gemara in Shabbos prescribes for Dovid, like Rosh haShanah commands for us, we set personal standards for the coming weeks and months, resolving that this year we will learn more Torah, that this year we will speak more appropriately, that this year we will focus more on davening than on conversing with our neighbors, that this year we will speak out for what is right rather than settle for what is popular.

The payoff of this Rosh haShanah drive for perfection is not only for ourselves and our own righteousness, but for our children, our nieces and nephews, and our grandchildren.

If we leapfrog Rosh haShanah’s intensity in pursuit of Yom Kippur’s forgiveness, then we teach our children to leapfrog their assignments and responsibilities as well, relying on whatever mercy they can beg from teachers and parents. Better to teach our children to demand much of themselves, to let their reach exceed their grasp as Robert Browning advised - and to teach that by our own example.

Daniel Burnham, an architect who designed, among other things, New York’s Flatiron Building and Washington DC’s Union Station, offered wise advice along these lines, urging us to demand much of ourselves. He advised, “Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood and probably themselves will not be realized. Make big plans; aim high in hope and work, remembering that a noble, logical diagram once recorded will never die, but long after we are gone will be a living thing, asserting itself with ever-growing insistency. Remember that our sons and grandsons are going to do things that would stagger us. ”

-
Notes:
1. This is more dvar torah than Derashah; I see the freedom to deliver a more simple dvar torah as a benefit of being out of the shul rabbinate.

2. The germ of this idea came from a friend who asked why the gemara in Shabbos is so bent on determining that Dovid did not sin, when the story of his teshuvah and its acceptance is so powerful.

3. The gemara that exonerates Dovid is Shabbat 56b. The gemara that indicates Dovid was modeling teshuvah for us is Avodah Zarah 4b-5a, and Tosafos there uses the term חטא explicitly. The problematic pasuk indicating Dovid's righteousness is Shemuel I 18:14, Moshe's declaration of יקוב הדין את ההר is Sanhedrin 6b, and the Rav Kook quote is from Orot haTeshuvah 5:6.

4. Thanks, Russell, for finding the origin of the Daniel Burnham quote here.

I waited my whole life for this book

I can't believe I've lived 38 years without reading Rav Kook's Orot haTeshuvah.

I'm presently developing a series of shiurim from Orot haTeshuvah - yes, my initial lishmah read has become a prepare-for-a-shiur read - and I am perpetually stunned by the Torah, beauty, depth, inspiration, confidence and encouragement found in every line.

Here's the sentence I just read (14:36):

כשאדם רוצה להיות דוקא צדיק גמור, קשה לו להיות בעל תשובה

When a person wants to be a complete tzaddik, it is difficult for him to be a person of teshuvah [return].

Is that not a stunningly gorgeous formulation? Or am I just drunk on Rav Kook, and all of you are wondering what's so special about that sentence?

Rav Kook on Teshuvah: Healthy, Natural and Guaranteed

As noted here, I've been learning Rav Kook's Orot haTeshuvah in Elul.

Drawing on sources from Tanach, Gemara and Kabbalah, Rav Avraham Yitzchak haKohen Kook taught that teshuvah is more than a mechanical, three-step method of admitting, correcting and abandoning our sins. As Rav Kook described it, Teshuvah is a glittering thread woven into the fabric of the universe, a natural longing for righteousness, and an engine inexorably moving all of Creation toward the original Divine vision of perfection.

Here are several key passages from Orot haTeshuvah, Rav Kook’s landmark work describing the nature of Teshuvah. The translation is almost linear; the original Hebrew is available at http://www.hebrewbooks.org/31307.


Teshuvah is guaranteed:
The world is guaranteed to come to full repentance. The world is not static; it continues to develop. True, complete development must bring about total physical and spiritual health, which will bring with it the light of the life of teshuvah. (Orot haTeshuvah 5:3)

Teshuvah comes from the longing of the entire universe to become better and more pure, stronger and more elevated than its current state. At the core of this drive is a life-force that triumphs over the limited, weak character of natural existence. The repentance of an individual, and certainly of the community, draws its strength from this life-force, which flows unceasingly, at full strength. (Orot haTeshuvah 6:1)

Teshuvah always resides in the heart; even at the moment of sin, the impulse for teshuvah is hidden in the soul, radiating influence which will be revealed later, with the arrival of the regret that calls for teshuvah. Teshuvah resides in the depths of existential life, for it preceded the universe, and before sin arrives its teshuvah is already prepared. Therefore, nothing in this universe is as certain as teshuvah, and, ultimately, all will be repaired. (Orot haTeshuvah 6:2)


Teshuvah is a natural product of health and maturity:
The desire for teshuvah is a person’s most healthy spiritual desire. A healthy soul in a healthy body is compelled to achieve the great bliss of teshuvah, experiencing in it the greatest natural pleasure.

A properly functioning body removes harmful materials, thereby improving and healing the body. One who is spiritually and physically healthy will remove evil deeds and the evil, corrupt impressions they produce, every evil thought, and the distance from Divine influence which founds all evil, crudeness and ugliness. (Orot haTeshuvah 5:1)


Teshuvah is a process of developing our potential:
A person’s life is perfected by developing his inherent character. However, one’s still-undeveloped character lacks insight, and so sin is guaranteed along this path of development. “There is no righteous person in the land who will commit good and not sin. [Kohelet 7:20]” On the other hand, eliminating one’s natural character in order to prevent sin is itself the greatest sin, [regarding which the Torah says of the nazir in Bamidbar 6:11,] “He shall atone for his sin against life.”

Therefore, Teshuvah repairs one’s corruption and restores the world and this person’s life to its root, specifically by helping the inherent character to develop. (Orot haTeshuvah 5:6)


The potential for Teshuvah is always present:
Even if a person consistently stumbles, damaging his righteousness and ethical behavior, this does not damage his fundamental perfection. A person’s fundamental perfection is found in his longing and desire to achieve perfection, a desire which is the foundation of teshuvah, and which continually governs his path in life. (Orot haTeshuvah 5:5)


The rewards of Teshuvah:
With every aspect of ugliness banished from a person’s soul upon his internal commitment to teshuvah, whole worlds are revealed, in celestial clarity, in the midst of his soul. Removal of sin is like removal of a blinder from above an eye, such that the full field of vision is now revealed, a light from the breadth of heaven, earth and all they contain. (Orot haTeshuvah 5:2)

Rav Kook says: Teshuvah. It's guaranteed.

I've been learning Rav Kook's Orot haTeshuvah this Elul. In honor of Rav Kook's 75th Yahrtzeit, observed today [and see my Canadian Jewish News article in his honor], I want to quote three lines.

From his introduction:

התשובה היא תופסת את החלק היותר גדול בתורה ובחיים, עליה בנויות כל התקוות האישיות והציבוריות

Teshuvah [repentance] occupies the greatest portion of Torah and Life, and upon it are founded all of the hopes of the individual and the community.

From Perek 5:

העולם מוכרח הוא לבא לידי תשובה שלימה

The universe is compelled to come to complete teshuvah.

And, most powerfully, from Perek 6:

אין דבר בטוח בעולם כמו התשובה

Nothing in this universe is as certain as teshuvah.

I cry when I read this sentences. Okay, I cry easily, but still - I haven't been this moved by a Torah text since the first time I read Rav Shimshon Raphael Hirsch.

Rav Kook spends a lot of time on the mystical character of teshuvah - how it ties into the fundamental nature of the universe, why it is necessary, how it influences one's actions in the past as well as the future - but he doesn't use mystical jargon. I find it inspiring, very readable, and very worthwhile.

I'm embarrassed it's taken me this long to learn it כסדר.

... and I'm an alcoholic

I'm disappointed that I haven't had the time to craft derashah-style divrei torah for this website in the past month. To make up for it in some way, here's an article I wrote for the bulletin of our beit midrash's host shul, Clanton Park Synagogue. You can also find an article of mine in the Rosh HaShanah "To Go" from YU'Torah, here; the whole To Go is here.


Over the past several years I have become involved in the addictions community, helping people who were dealing with addictions and hosting a chapter of JACS (Jewish Alcoholics, Chemically dependent persons and Significant others) in Allentown, Pennsylvania.

One of the most striking elements of the JACS program, as with secular addictions programs, is the way that the addict perpetually introduces himself as an addict. Rather than say, “I was an alcoholic,” or “I was an addict,” a man or woman with decades of clean history will still say, “I am an alcoholic,” “I am an addict.”

When I first heard this mode of self-identification, I was troubled by the way it seems to fly in the face of the Rambam's advice. He writes (Hilchot Teshuvah 2:4):

”מדרכי התשובה להיות ...משנה שמו כלומר 'אני אחר, ואיני אותו האיש שעשה אותן המעשים”.

“Among the paths of repentance is that the penitent person should... change his name, as if to say, 'I am someone else, and I am not that man who performed those deeds.'”

The Rambam's advice, which is based on a gemara (Rosh HaShanah 16b), seems to argue that someone seeking to change his ways should abandon his past identity and declare himself to be someone new; how would this gel with self-identifying as an addict for life?

In fact, this may be the question at the core of a talmudic dispute. The gemara (Yoma 86b) records a debate regarding viduy:

“עבירות שהתודה עליהן יום הכיפורים זה לא יתודה עליהן יום הכיפורים אחר, ואם שנה בהן צריך להתודות יום הכיפורים אחר, ואם לא שנה בהן וחזר והתודה עליהן עליו הכתוב אומר 'ככלב שב על קאו כן כסיל שונה באולתו.'

רבי אליעזר בן יעקב אומר כל שכן שהוא משובח, שנאמר 'כי פשעי אני אדע וחטאתי נגדי תמיד.”’

“Regarding sins one admitted on this Yom Kippur, one should not admit them again on another Yom Kippur. One who repeated them must admit them on another Yom Kippur, but regarding one who did not repeat them and yet admitted them, the Torah says (Mishlei 26), 'Like a dog who sits in his vomit, so is a fool who repeats his foolishness.'

“Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov says, 'He is all the more praiseworthy! It is written (Tehillim 51), 'For I know my transgressions, and my sins are before me always!'”

The tanna kama (initial anonymous view) contends that one who confesses old sins is like a dog sitting in his own vomit, and one should not dwell upon his old identity, apparently opposing the JACS practice. Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov, on the other hand, says that it is praiseworthy to remember one's dated deviance, like the person who acknowledges his addiction perpetually.

However, this distinction is not necessarily correct; perhaps both the tanna kama and Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov endorse embracing a new identity Perhaps the debate between the tanna kama and Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov is actually a matter of psychology: Will repeated evocation of old sins keep me from developing a new persona?

That debate revolves around the word שונה, “repeat,” as used in that pasuk from Mishlei, “Like a dog who sits in his vomit, so is a fool who is שונה his foolishness”:

The tanna kama takes שונה to imply verbalization and study, like ושננתם לבניך, the mitzvah of teaching our children verbally. A sinner who speaks of his sins and reviews them is like a dog sitting in his vomit.

Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov, though, understands שונה in the sense of שנים, repetition of the sinful act itself. Speaking of the sin does not mean I am a dog returning to my vomit; only actual commission of the sin would be a foolish caninity. Speaking of the sin can actually aid me in my teshuvah.

Rabbi Elazar ben Yaakov’s distinction – performing teshuvah by speaking of old sins, while envisioning ourselves as new people – appears to be consistent with the Rambam's writings. Even though the Rambam recommends that one see himself as a new person, he also rules like Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov that one should repeat old sins in his viduy (Hilchot Teshuvah 2:8):

“ עבירות שהתודה עליהן יום הכיפורים זה חוזר ומתודה עליהן ביום הכיפורים אחר אף על פי שהוא עומד בתשובתו שנאמר 'כי פשעי אני אדע וחטאתי נגדי תמיד.,”

“Regarding sins one admitted on this Yom Kippur, one should again admit them on another Yom Kippur, even though he remains steadfast in his repentance, as it is written (Tehillim 51), 'For I know my transgressions, and my sins are before me always.'”

What we have, then, is a fundamental debate about the psychology of repentance: Is my teshuvah better served by forgetting my past altogether, or by recalling my past constantly? And Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov, and the Rambam, and JACS side with George Santayana, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

But there must be a limit; at what point may we see our sins as past? Must we identify ourselves as addicts through our entire lives, for sins committed decades ago? Can that truly help us?

This may be where the Rambam's advice - to see ourselves as new people – is most helpful. We stop recalling old sins when we are in danger of allowing them to take over our identity.

Rav Eliyahu Dessler made a similar point (Michtav mei'Eliyahu I pg. 255) regarding the tactics of the yetzer hara, that element which seduces us to sin:

“הסתת היצר מגעת עד כדי שנחשוב שרצונו הוא רצוננו... מעולם לא נבחין אותו טוען 'הלא אתה צריך' אלא 'הלא אני צריך.'... היצר גנב את הבחנת האני שלנו.”

“The yetzer seduces us to the point where we think that its desire is our desire... We never perceive him demanding, 'You need to do this,' but rather we see it as our own 'I need to do this.'... The yetzer steals our sense of our own independent identity.”

A Jew who perpetually identifies himself by his sins, who lives a life of “I am an addict,” internalizes the sin so that he sees it as his own goal, his own desire. When we are in danger of falling prey to this predator, when we realize that we are identifying ourselves too closely with the sin, then we have reached the moment to step away and to stop admitting the sin. That is the moment when we must run to the Rambam's counsel, “See yourself as 'not that man who performed those deeds.'”

May all of us merit to leave behind our sins, remembering our past without letting it take over our identity, becoming new people, and so meriting a כתיבה וחתימה טובה.

Light material on packing, heavier material on viduy

[This week's Haveil Havalim is here.]

Trying to fit the last items (90% of everything we have ever owned, but those are still the "last" items...) into boxes today.

True scene from packing-
The Rebbetzin: Are all of these suits being packed?
Me: All except the ugly one.
The Rebbetzin: Which one is that?

And then, this morning’s ScienceDaily email brought a link to an interesting packing article:

World Record In Packing Puzzle Set In Tetrahedra Jam: Better Understanding Of Matter Itself?

ScienceDaily (Aug. 15, 2009) — Finding the best way to pack the greatest quantity of a specifically shaped object into a confined space may sound simple, yet it consistently has led to deep mathematical concepts and practical applications, such as improved computer security codes.

When mathematicians solved a famed sphere-packing problem in 2005, one that first had been posed by renowned mathematician and astronomer Johannes Kepler in 1611, it made worldwide headlines.

Now, two Princeton University researchers have made a major advance in addressing a twist in the packing problem, jamming more tetrahedra -- solid figures with four triangular faces -- and other polyhedral solid objects than ever before into a space. The work could result in better ways to store data on compact discs as well as a better understanding of matter itself…

…Not to mention, it would really help the Torczyner clan figure out how to pack all of our sefarim, tools, computer gear and toys into these boxes…

But this post will not be entirely devoid of Torah. I’ve been mulling a conflict between the Rambam and the Sefer Chasidim regarding Viduy, our verbal acknowledgment of sin on Yom Kippur:

As the Rambam writes in the beginning of Hilchot Teshuvah (Laws of Repentance), we are instructed to acknowledge our sins to Gd. This mitzvah is called Viduy. The Rambam writes:
כל מצות שבתורה בין עשה בין לא תעשה אם עבר אדם על אחת מהן בין בזדון בין בשגגה כשיעשה תשובה וישוב מחטאו חייב להתודות לפני האל ברוך הוא שנאמר איש או אשה כי יעשו וגו' והתודו את חטאתם אשר עשו זה וידוי דברים, וידוי זה מצות עשה, כיצד מתודין אומר אנא השם חטאתי עויתי פשעתי לפניך ועשיתי כך וכך והרי נחמתי ובושתי במעשי ולעולם איני חוזר לדבר זה, וזהו עיקרו של וידוי, וכל המרבה להתודות ומאריך בענין זה הרי זה משובח

The Sefer Chasidim (#20) seems to agree with this definition of Viduy, citing the Rambam with only marginal difference:
כל מצוה שבתורה בין עשה בין ל"ת אם יעבור אדם על אחד מהם בין בשוגג בין בזדון כשיעשה תשובה וישוב מחטאיו חייב להתודאות לפני האלהים יתעלה שמו שנאמר איש או אשה (אשר) [כי] יעשו מכל [וגומ'] והתודו את חטאתם זה וידוי דברים ובה מ"ע. כיצד מתודה אומר אנא ה' חטאתי עויתי פשעתי לפניך כך וכך עשיתי והרי נחמתי ובשתי במעשי ולעולם איני חוזר לדבר זה. וזה עיקרו של וידוי. וכל המרבה להתודאות והאריך בענין הרי זה משובח.

However, the Rambam and Sefer Chasidim disagree regarding a key issue: If I acknowledged a specific sin last Yom Kippur, and I have not repeated it, do I need to include it in this year’s viduy?

This is subject to a talmudic debate among tannaim [sages of the mishnaic era] (Yoma 86b):
תנו רבנן: עבירות שהתודה עליהן יום הכפורים זה - לא יתודה עליהן יום הכפורים אחר, ואם שנה בהן - צריך להתודות יום הכפורים אחר, ואם לא שנה בהן וחזר והתודה עליהן - עליו הכתוב אומר ככלב שב על קאו כסיל שונה באולתו. רבי אליעזר בן יעקב אומר: כל שכן שהוא משובח, שנאמר כי פשעי אני אדע וחטאתי נגדי תמיד. אלא מה אני מקיים ככלב שב על קאו וגו' - כדרב הונא, דאמר רב הונא: כיון שעבר אדם עבירה ושנה בה - הותרה לו. - הותרה לו סלקא דעתך? אלא אימא: נעשית לו כהיתר.

The anonymous initial view in this debate is that one should not re-acknowledge the sin in the following year, and that one who does so is like a dog sitting in his own vomit.
Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov disagrees, saying it is praiseworthy to re-acknowledge the sin, for this behavior displays an awareness of the foul nature of the sin.

So along comes the Rambam (Hilchot Teshuvah 2:8), and he agrees with Rabbi Eliezer ben Yaakov:
עבירות שהתודה עליהם ביום הכפורים זה חוזר ומתודה עליהן ביום הכפורים אחר אע"פ ו שהוא עומד בתשובתו שנאמר כי פשעי אני אדע וחטאתי נגדי תמיד.

But the Sefer Chasidim (#621), who cited the Rambam’s definition of repentance and who generally agrees with the Rambam, follows the initial view from that debate:

אדם שהתודה ביוה"כ הזה על עונו לא יתודה ליוה"כ אחר אותם עונות שלא יהא ככלב שב על קיאו (כן) כסיל שונה באולתו ולר' אלעזר בן יעקב מותר להתודאות שנאמר כי פשעי אני אדע וחטאתי נגדי תמיד ואם שאר ימים יתודה בשנה הוא מתודה על כל עונותיו כדי שיתחרט כשיזכיר עונותיו וידאב לבו לשמים ותמיד יתחרט על עונותיו כי מפני שזוכר עונותיו ישים תשובה בלבו וכל זה אינו ככלב שב על קיאו.

To be sure, Sefer Chasidim does cite the view of R’ Eliezer ben Yaakov, and he does permit [if not encourage] year-round viduy for old sins in order for one to remember and regret his sin – but not on Yom Kippur.

So here’s my question: Why is there a debate between R’ Eliezer ben Yaakov and an anonymous sage regarding re-acknolwedging old sins? And why does Rambam side with R’ Eliezer ben Yaakov, while the anonymous sage does not?

[Note: Hebrew citations here are courtesy of the Bar Ilan CD-ROM; too busy to re-type them myself today.]

Back to the boxes…

A-Rod and Elazar ben Durdaya (Derashah Mishpatim 5769)

Star athlete Alex Rodriguez would like to be judged for his single moment of contrition, rather than his career of steroid use. He is trying to take advantage of an instant of Teshuvah (repentance), following the model of Elazar ben Durdaya.


Elazar ben Durdaya, who lived in the time of the Mishnah over 1800 years ago, immersed himself, thoroughly, in one of Judaism’s most serious sins: He visited every זונה he could find, anywhere, and paid any exorbitant price that was asked.

Once, a זונה commented to Elazar that someone like him could never repent for his crimes. Her words, and the strong way she expressed them, penetrated to his calloused soul and moved him. He immediately fled into the wilderness and dramatically beseeched Nature itself – the mountains, the heavens, the earth, the sun, the moon and the stars – to pray on his behalf. Then, in a moment of sublime contrition, Elazar wept with all of his heart, and exhaled his final breath in a state of repentance.

A voice emerged from the heavens and declared, “Rabbi Elazar ben Durdaya has earned a place in the afterlife!” Rabbi Yehudah haNasi, the great sage and leader also known as Rebbe, canonizer of the Mishnah, exclaimed in tears, “יש קונה עולמו בשעה אחת, One can acquire his place in the afterlife in just one moment – and the Heavens will even call him Rabbi!”


Rebbe declared that one may acquire his place in Heaven in just a moment – and it is this idea of a defining moment of repentance and redress and redemption, that motivates an Alex Rodriguez to try to rehabilitate his career with a late-in-the-game apology.

But R’ Shlomo Eideles, in his “Maharsha” commentary to the gemara, explained that this was not Rebbe’s message; his point was not that we can correct our life’s errors in an instant. Rebbe was not crying tears of joy at the possibility of instantaneous rehabilitation. Rather, Rebbe was crying tears of frustration and anger – because our lives are filled with such defining moments, instants which lack apparent drama but nonetheless offer opportunities for greatness, and we routinely pass them by! This Elazar ben Durdaya, this Alex Rodriguez, could have capitalized on a lifetime of opportunities, could have built up a life of good deeds and an afterlife of great rewards, but they waited out the clock and wasted all of that time!

Look at Rabbi Yehudah HaNasi himself; he did not become Rebbe by capitalizing on some momentary opportunity! Rebbe slaved away at his studies, devoted hours and days and weeks and months and years of defining moments to compiling the mishnah, lobbied the Roman Antoninus on behalf of his fellow Jews, and led the Jews of Tzippori and Israel. Rabbi Elazar ben Durdaya could have done that, too – but only if he had woken up much earlier, taking advantage of not a single Defining Moment but many.


Our parshah, too, accentuates our lifetime’s series of defining opportunities.

Right after we stand at Har Sinai in Parshat Yitro, right after we receive the Torah and hear the grand and intimidating voice of Gd boom out, “I am the Lord your Gd who took you out of Egypt,” right after we witness a mountain shrouded in flame, shaking with thunder and illuminated by lightning, right after we receive instructions for constructing sacred altars on which we will serve our lofty Gd – we receive a laundry list of economic minutiae, civil law on the most mundane level governing remuneration for violence and property damage, economic relationships and property ownership.

And then, just as suddenly, the Torah reverts to the story of an awestruck nation cowering before its unfathomable Creator and King.

This juxtaposition of Divine encounter with picayune detail impresses upon us that life is not a series of insignificant ripples and eddies emanating outward from singular Sinai moments of birth and crisis and watershed and death. Life is a series of less-dramatic Sinai opportunities, and any given day, any given relationship, any given opportunity, however understated, harbors the bubbling potential of a Defining moment.

This is why some Jews do not stand when we read the עשרת הדברות, those Ten Commandments, in shul: To demonstrate that the entire Torah, whether discussing shatnez or Shabbos, kashrus or קריעת ים סוף, addressing every day of our lives, carries equal portent, equal holiness, equal power.


A sacred life should not revolve around a single moment.
• Avraham faced 10 tests, not just 1.
• Yosef faced a daily test from the advances of his employer’s wife, and not just one day’s challenge.
• Rabbi Eliezer taught his students to repent every day as though it was their last, and not wait for some special moment.

And we dare not wait for Elul, for Rosh haShanah, for Yom Kippur, to apologize to others, to come to minyan, to give tzedakah.
And we dare not allow relationships to deterioriate until some seminal, dramatic, Sinaiesque moment, but we repair them now, today.
And we dare not procrastinate in introducing the holy into our lives and our homes, with berachot and tefillah and mezuzah and kashrut.


Certainly, there are moments of greater inspiration, stand-out occasions which move us to great heights, but there are two dangers in bypassing daily chances while waiting for such singular moments:
• First, when that Sinai comes, we may miss it or we may be unable to take advantage.
• Second, people who wait for some inspiring moment end up waiting a long time – and then, when the moment comes and then passes, the inspiration disappears and they commence waiting for the next wave of fervor.

There’s no need to wait: Our lives are constructed of day after day of more subtle Defining Moments, and the people who recognize this potential are the ones who transcend the momentary greatness of R’ Elazar ben Durdaya, and achieve the enduring prominence of Rebbe.


At the start of our parshah, we read about the fate of a Jew who steals and is unable to pay for his theft; he is sold as an עבד, a slave, for six years. At the end of those years, regardless of how much he stole, he is given his freedom.

But the Torah’s version of slavery isn’t too bad – the עבד receives the best bed in the house and the best food in the house, cannot be given painfully difficult or demeaning work, and cannot be made to work night and day. So the עבד might reach the end of his slavery and declare, “All things considered - I’d like to stay as an עבד.”

The Torah permits him to remain – but then his ear is pierced. חז"ל (the sages) explained that because he heard Gd say לא תגנוב, Do not steal, at Har Sinai, and yet he stole, we pierce his ear.
But if this disobedience is why we pierce his ear, then why do it now, six years after the theft? And why do we only pierce the ear of the עבד who chooses to remain as an עבד?

Rav Shimon Schwab explained that while the original theft was illegal, it might be excusable; perhaps it was a momentary error, or a crime committed under the pressure of circumstance. Now, though, six years later, this עבד has an opportunity to re-define himself as an honest person, to leave behind his theft. He can move on, and take advantage of this chance to begin anew. If the עבד instead allows his big moment from six years earlier to define him, if he fails to understand that every day is a new chance to chart a path, then we pierce his ear and say, “Learn from your mistakes – start over!”

May we learn from Rebbe rather than Alex Rodriguez, R’ Elazar ben Durdaya and the עבד, and seize each day’s opportunity to begin anew.

-
Notes
1. This derashah is dedicated in honor of a volunteer whose 75th birthday is this Shabbos. He truly lives a life of taking advantage of each day's defining moments.

2. Elazar ben Durdaya's story is on Avodah Zarah 17a. The Maharsha says that Rebbe was referring to the heavens themselves giving Elazar the title of Rebbe.

3. The Maharsha's explanation for Rebbe's tears is on Avodah Zarah 10a, in Chiddushei Aggadot.

Daf: Sotah 31-32

Some interesting points here, both in terms of gemara approach and in terms of philosophy. Enjoy, preferably with a gemara in front of you.

31a
The gemara debates whether to read Yeshayah 63:9 as בכל צרתם לא צר or as בכל צרתם לו צר, whether Gd is troubled, or not troubled, when are are troubled. Why doesn’t the gemara point out that the word itself is subject to קרי and כתיב variation in the Masoretic text? We know that קרי and כתיב variants are employed throughout the gemara.

Also: It’s odd that the gemara here omits from the לא-לו discussion the most famous such variant, from Vayyikra 25:30. That variant is discussed in the gemara, just not here.

The gemara here seems to shift gears in its translation of יראה – at first it refers to fear of punishment, but then it seems to shift to awe of Gd. See the Torah Temimah to Devarim 7:10, note טו; he is adamant that יראה as used in this context refers not to fear of punishment, but to awe of Gd.

31b
It seems odd that we would believe a single witness here, particularly one who has an axe to grind. I would remind the reader, though, that this is a case of רגלים לדבר, the equivalent of a driver pulled over for erratic driving, with an open beer in the car. Even before the breathalyzer, there is a circumstantial-evidence argument to support the contention that he was driving drunk. Here, too, קינוי and subsequent סתירה establish a suspicious fact pattern before we ever arrive at the single witness to a sexual act.

32a
Although one may be able to fulfill certain obligatory prayers in English, that’s only fine for the first time or the second – one should still work to learn to daven in the original!

32b
Note that Rashi (at the top) has a different text in our gemara, using the pasuk of ואמר אל האשה.

Rashi here, on ארמי אובד אבי, varies from his commentary on the Torah. On the Torah he assumes that אבי is Yaakov, but here he says it is Lavan who is “my father”! Of course, in his commentary to the Torah he is citing the Sifri and explaining it, and the Sifri varies from our gemara, but I still find his version here very interesting and worth further analysis.

Our gemara here provides one reason for the silent Amidah; the more famous reason is in Berachot 33 or so, from Chanah.

Note that Chullin makes it clear that an observer in the Beit haMikdash will still know which korban a person is bringing, despite the fact that the location for חטאת and עולה are the same. We still try to provide whatever concealment is possible.

Here, once again, we find the tension between public acknowledgement of sin and concealment of error. Yehudah was praised earlier in Sotah for publicly acknowledging error (הודה ולא בוש), but as we have pointed out in earlier Daf comments (such as here), we also say אשרי נשוי פשע כסוי חטאה, better not to admit sin aloud, if the sin is not already commonly known, lest that admission de-sensitize people to wrongdoing.

Daf: Sotah 10-11

There is so much to see and say here, and no time to write it all down in a clear form. Here is some of it, anyway:

10b
On the line, “Better to throw one’s self into an oven than to embarrass another person publicly,” Rashi takes our gemara simply: We see that one should let himself be put in an oven rather than embarrass someone else, since Tamar was willing to suffer this fate. Tosafos in Bava Metzia 59a points out that this is seen in the Torah’s pasuk itself, in which the word מוצאת does not have any vowels on the א, so that the word is actually מוצת, to be kindled (a la ויצת אש בציון – Eichah 4).

The gemara notes the recurrence of הכר נא in the book of Bereishit linking the sale of Yosef with Yehudah/Tamar, but there are many more borrowed phrases and images unifying Bereishit (as well as the Torah itself), and giving the lie to the Documentary Hypothesis. A few quick examples: The young goats (Yaakov’s meal for Yitzchak, the goat’s blood for Yosef’s tunic, Tamar’s fee), the link of עלי קללתך and עלי היו כלנה, the numerous references to walking in the דרך ה', and the cross-biblical theme of צדקה ומשפט which carries us from Bereishit 18:19 all the way through Devarim 33:21 and then into the neviim.

The gemara talks about Yehudah being named for his future admission/הודאה, but the Torah gives a reason for his name – it’s הפעם אודה את ה', Leah’s thanks to Gd! Maharsha says she would have named him אודה under her original reason; HaShem inspired her to call him יהודה.

I am puzzled by the gemara’s declaration that Yehudah sanctified the Name of HaShem by publicly admitting his wrong; we are taught אשרי נשוי פשע כסוי חטאה (and see the Rambam in the beginning of Hilchot Teshuvah on this point) that one should not divulge private sin to the masses, lest it actually cause a desecration and desensitization!

11a
See the Maharsha on the gemara's analysis of the pasuk describing Miriam's wait for Moshe.

Why do we bring a pasuk from Yeshayah מי נח זאת לי as proof that won’t destroy the world with water, instead of bringing the post-Flood biblical pledge, לא אוסיף להכות את כל חי?! Perhaps because that earlier pasuk isn't water-specific?

The gemara here regarding Yisro's reward for refusing to participate in Paroh’s persecution indicates that Yisro's descendants, or at least some of them, did become Jewish. (See our discussion on Yael.) But then why did they live next to Amalek, per Shemuel I on Shaul’s war with Amalek?

Some have the minhag of blowing a Teruah Gedolah at the end of Yom Kippur. This mirrors Rashi here, that the Jews heard a Teruah at Har Sinai, since the shofar blast at the end of the Revelation at Har Sinai (במשוך היובל המה יעלו בהר) is one of the sources for the shofar blast at the end of Yom Kippur.

Rashi's two approaches to translating the gemara on ערי מסכנות take the Gemara’s line in opposite directions – one is that it's about the building in Egypt, the other is that it's about construction in general.

On “resembling thorns in their eyes,” the Maharsha's approach (the Egyptians resembled thorns in their own eyes) seems to fit the wording more accurately than Rashi (the Egyptians felt punctured by thorns).

11b
The pasuk brought here, תחת התפוח עוררתיך שמה חבלתך אמך שמה חבלה יולדתך, is one source for the myth that the fruit in the garden was the apple, from a mis-reading of the Hebrew root ח-ב-ל as corruption – “Under the apple tree, your mother corrupted you.” It should be read like חבלי לידה, “your mother birthed you.” (There is also a second source, the Latin “mal” which is associated with the apple/malus.)

The Maharsha explains why I might be more or less likely to identify Miriam or Elisheva as the second of the meyaldot.

The Gemara’s derash readings of חיות depend on reading it with a patach under the ח, instead of the actual kamatz.

The gemara that says Miriam gave birth to Chur after her illness must not be referring to her illness with tzaraat, but rather to a childhood illness, for Chur was dead (per midrash) by the time she experienced her tzaraat. This also fits 12a; see Rashi on 12a עזובה.