Yom haMeyuchas and Reflected Glory

Today, the 2nd of Sivan, is a special day on the calendar: Yom haMeyuchas יום המיוחס.

"Yichus יחוס" is colloquially used in reference to aristocratic lineage, so that the name “Yom haMeyuchas” ends up with bizarre translations. I have seen renderings like Day of the Noble, for example, from people who ought to know better.

But yichus actually means “association” or “relationship.” (Hence the word יחסית - relatively.) Someone with "good yichus" is someone who has good associates/relations. And a day that is "meyuchas" is a day with special associates.

Indeed, this day has nothing inherently special. Although some do identify possible value for this day itself based on the run-up to Sinai and its status in the Omer, at bottom the 2nd of Sivan is simply the day after Rosh Chodesh and the day before the 3 days of preparation for the presentation of the Torah, and that association is what confers upon it special status.

This explanation is consistent with the gemara (Taanit 17b-18b) which talks about special days we don’t fast or don’t eulogize, just because those days precede or follow key days on the Jewish calendar. These days themselves don’t have any celebratory characteristics, but the status of their neighbors spills over to them.

Part of me feels like this concept of Reflected Glory is a bad thing, especially when it feels like the whole world has gone Yom haMeyuchas. We clamor for autographs from benchwarming ballplayers, we drop the names of former classmates who have gone on to greatness, we talk about great-uncles and third-cousins who have just published a hit novel or appear in a new movie, we go to great lengths to see and be seen.

But there is also a positive to hanging around in good company, and perhaps this is the message of Yom haMeyuchas: Choose good friends, associates who will influence you positively. It is not the pursuit of reflected glory; rather, it is the pursuit of personal glory, through glorious role models. (Cf. Avot 4:14, 4:15, and 6:9, as well as R' Elazar ben Arach in Shabbat 147b.)

Avraham and Sarah can move to the edge of the desert, set up their inn (Sotah 10a-b) and be a model for the world. For the rest of us, though, there are times when we need to be a Yom haMeyuchas, learning from others and so developing ourselves.

Yom haMeyuchas Sameach!

Newsflash: Peer Pressure affects diet, alcohol consumption

[Note: This week’s Haveil Havalim is here.]

I love those studies that make you scratch your head and say, “And just how much did you spend on this?”

Yes, I know that sometimes we need the proof that comes with statistical analysis, and sometimes a study does provide refined insight… but please don’t tell me that the overall findings in these tautological studies are "surprising":

People without job training or experience
earn lower salaries!
Film at 11!

Popular people tend to be invited to more parties,
studies show

Well, here’s one fresh out of the Inbox: Part Of The In-group? A Surprising New Strategy Helps Reduce Unhealthy Behaviors.

The article explains, “Authors Jonah Berger (University of Pennsylvania) and Lindsay Rand (Stanford University) found that linking a risky behavior with an "outgroup" (a group that the targeted audience doesn't want to be confused with) caused participants to reduce unhealthy behaviors.”

So, in other words: To avoid being associated with a certain group, I won’t act like the members of that group.

Didn’t we all learn this back in high school?

Here’s one study they ran: “Students on their way to a campus eatery were surveyed about perceptions of the media. A control group read an article about politics and pop culture, and a second group read an article associating junk-food eating with online gamers (an "outgroup"). When research assistants observed the two groups ordering food, they found that the group who had read the article about online gamers made healthier choices.”

Right – The geeks eat junk food, I don’t want to be called a geek, so I won’t eat junk food. Thank you, U of P and Stanford, for clarifying that point for me. (Apologies to on-line gamers; this was not my study.)

In truth, there is one pedagogic point I should make, and I would have loved to see the study examine this:

The study's method is a negative reinforcement technique, preying on people’s fear of being despised. It’s the equivalent of telling your child, “Don’t wipe your nose on your sleeve; only low-class people do that.”

Far better – and more effective, I would hope - to choose a positive reinforcement technique: “You know, respectable people use tissues.”

Avot d’Rabbi Natan records regarding Aharon haKohen: Aharon would make sure to greet everyone warmly and inquire after their welfare. Then, one those people were faced with opportunities to sin, they would resist the temptation – because they wanted to be the type of person worthy of being greeted by Aharon haKohen.

Yes, I’d prefer the positive – Link healthy behavior with the in-group, and watch how people flock to it.