A few weeks ago, in a morning minyan, I saw a gabbai offer hagbah (the honour of lifting the Torah and displaying it to the community after the public Torah reading) to someone near me in shul. He did what I think of as the "Hagbah Shrug", telegraphing in a simple gesture: I don't really want to do this, but I'll do it if you have no one else.
It bothered me.
On one hand, we are taught to humbly refuse honours; see Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim 53:16, for example, encouraging limited refusal of a request to lead the davening, unless invited by someone of great status. Shunning the spotlight isn't a bad thing; it's a function of humility and of tzniut (privacy).
But on the other hand, refusal strikes me as arrogant, and insulting to the Torah itself. It feels like an expression of indifference. Rav Moshe Sternbuch (Teshuvos v'Hanhagos 2:319) reports that on Simchas Torah, Rav Chaim Brisker would not give away the Torah he was holding at the end of a hakafah, unless someone requested the Torah. This reflects love and respect for the Torah. So what is the message reflected by shrugging, "I'll do it if I must"?
And consider the impact on the next generation. Our teens are already practiced in demonstrating cool disregard for society's honours; it's a natural part of growing up. Do we need to add incentive by showing that everyone does it?
[Not to mention what this does to the poor gabbai; see my 2009 post, Not Me is alive and well in Gabbailand.]
I would suggest an intermediate reaction, displaying respect as well as humility. Perhaps, something along the lines of, "I am honoured to be asked, but I wouldn't mind if someone more worthy would receive it." And if you really don't want to do it, then, "I'm sorry to decline, but I'd really prefer not to, today."
Am I just being hypersensitive?
Sunday, April 26, 2015
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I'm not sure I entirely agree. I think some people feel uncomfortable with hagbah in particular as opposed to any other honour. They (I include myself here) fear doing it badly or even dropping the sefer Torah. Some people might also have health issues regarding lifting (a serious problem in my shul, which has an aging population). I would accept most honours, but I feel very uncomfortable doing hagbah, although I realise it's a fear I'll have to face sooner or later.
ReplyDeleteDaniel-
ReplyDeleteAgreed; I'm talking about someone who is accepting, but displaying an apathetic reluctance. Someone who fears that he cannot do it should decline decisively, I think.
Some Sifrei Torah are really heavy. Also, some people, having seen some exhibitionists open up far too many columns of the Sefer Torah, don't feel up to that.
ReplyDeleteTrue; see my response to Daniel...
DeletePeople don't want to flat out reject it, if they might really be needed.
DeleteOver a dozen times in the last several years I've been asked to lead services or take some other kibud only to discover, on my way up to the bimah, that someone else was already on their way to take the kibud either because the other gabbai offered it to him too or because he simply felt it was coming to him. I've been on the bimah and heard people muttering "Why him again?"
ReplyDeleteSo after a while I got tired of it. I'm in shul to daven, not to be a glory hound. Let those guys have the kibudim and leave me alone in the back seat to commune with my Creator.
I hear you, but I still think there are better ways than the shrug that conveys disinterest.
DeleteSee here for a response in the form of my brother's amazing article, which originally appeared in Jewish Action.
ReplyDeletehttp://images.shulcloud.com/164/attachments/4261_2010_November.pdf
That's great! But the end is not included in the pdf...?
Delete