Judaism and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Part 2

Following up from yesterday, here is Part 2 of the source sheet; Part 3, the Bibliography, is set to post on Monday morning...

Treating observant Jewish patients with OCD: Recommendations for Psychologists

1.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 927-928

Appropriate behavior is environmentally determined, and just as healthy surgeons wash their hands relatively often, it may be the case that people in certain cultures or religious groups are slightly more bothered by intrusive thoughts.

2.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 932

Cognitive–behavior therapy for OCD requires a clear conceptualization of the individual patient’s core concerns and fears. For example, it is not sufficient to know that someone washes excessively. A fear of contracting HIV/AIDS is very different from one of touching dirt (just because it is disgusting), which is very different from an obsession that one will become like the person whom one touches. Thus, understanding the ultimate consequence or core fear is important.

3.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 936

In addition, there are times that OCD patients ritualize by praying to prevent bad things from happening after doing an exposure. Some therapists would encourage patients to “spoil” or undo this ritual by praying for bad things to happen. However, given that religious patients believe in the efficacy of prayer, they may be reluctant to engage in such an act. An alternate approach is to ask them to undo the ritual by praying instead to “allow God’s will.” This suggests that if the person is to die, then allow that, and if not, then not. It inserts ambiguity and removes active attempts to prevent the negative outcome.

4.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 934

There are notions within Judaism that one should not articulate bad things for fear of them happening (al tiftach peh), and that some thoughts are forbidden (hirhurim). When treating a religious patient with OCD, engaging in a debate about whether thoughts are inconsequential can sidetrack treatment because religious patients may believe that some thoughts are in fact sinful. Instead, it is more productive to address different aspects of OCD thoughts…

5.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 934

Other subtle differences in framing identical information during psychoeducation are also important. With nonreligious patients, for example, we often discuss the evolutionary function of anxiety and how it has gone awry in OCD. Some religious patients are resistant to the theory of evolution or find it heretical; for them, it can be useful to express the same concepts in religious terms: “Why did God endow us with the ability to feel anxious? What purpose does it serve?”

6.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 934

[O]vercorrection allows the individual to return to a normal level of behavior after they complete treatment… In Judaism, the concept of overcorrection was elucidated by the medieval scholar, Maimonides, who described the process in reference to working on one’s character traits. He advised that to refine character flaws one must adopt the extreme opposite behavior, and that by doing so, one will arrive at a middle path. Orthodox patients place great value on the study of rabbinic texts and are used to considering behavior in reference to sources in rabbinic literature. Hence, it can be useful to refer to the overcorrection process used in response prevention as part of the writings of a foremost Jewish scholar rather than a new scientific concept.

7.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 928

Understanding that OCD is not caused by religious adherence, but rather that such adherence can influence how OCD manifests in religious patients (i.e., in religious obsessions and compulsions) enables the clinician to use the patient’s religious beliefs as a framework to treat the disorder more effectively. Recruiting rather than combating patient religiosity in service of treatment supports the patient in reclaiming religion as an aspect of their life that brings meaning and comfort, rather than distress.

8.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 933

By providing a sensitive rationale, the therapist can alleviate the skepticism and create an open, therapeutic environment. For example, a number of patients have articulated “If I just weren’t religious, I wouldn’t have this problem.” Although not necessarily intended to test the therapist, a statement such as this creates an opportunity for psychoeducation and alliance building. One response might be, “You might not have OCD about halacha, but you would likely have it about something else instead. You cannot run away from OCD.” Such statements dispel concerns that the therapist believes that religion is part of the problem.

9.   Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 933

Another part of the rationale for treatment that should be conveyed early on is that OCD is likely a barrier to the spiritual connection religious patients want to have with God, and that EX/RP can be a way to help them rebuild that relationship.

10.      Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 933

When treating religious patients, we believe it is not necessary or appropriate to include exposure to actual sin. Obsessional fears are usually driven more by actions that lead to increased (albeit small) risk than by actions that truly cause the feared consequence. For example, patients who are afraid of touching a book on AIDS, leaving the house with the oven on, or handling knives around their baby, typically believe that these are risky behaviors, not ones that will definitely lead to the feared consequences. During EX/RP, it is helpful for patients to accept risks by acknowledging the possibility of their feared outcomes, but most individuals do not need to state that they are definitely going to get AIDS, burn their house down, or kill their child. Exposures do not usually require individuals actually to experience the ultimate negative consequences, but rather to tolerate risk, ambiguity, and uncertainty. Similarly, scrupulous patients need not actually sin or tell themselves that they are doing so; instead, they need to allow for slightly greater risk than others normally would, without actually making the violation occur.

Treating observant Jewish patients with OCD: How Judaism can help

11.      Talmud, Yoma 44b

בכל יום היה חותה בשל כסף וכו', מאי טעמא? התורה חסה על ממונן של ישראל.

"Every day, the kohen raked the coals with a silver receptacle [and then put the coals into a gold receptacle]." Why? The Torah spared Israelite property.

12.      Code of Jewish Law, Yoreh Deah 248:7

אדם שוע שנותן צדקה יותר מהראוי לו, או שמיצר לעצמו ונותן לגבאי כדי שלא יתבייש, אסור לתובעו ולגבות ממנו צדקה, והגבאי שמכלימו ושואל ממנו, עתיד הקב"ה ליפרע ממנו.

Regarding a generous person who gives more than is appropriate for him, or who pains himself to give to the collector to avoid shame, one may not demand and collect tzedakah from him. Gd will punish a collector who shames him and asks of him.

13.      Proverbs 3:17

דְּרָכֶיהָ דַרְכֵי־נֹעַם וְכָל־נְתִיבֹתֶיהָ שָׁלוֹם:

Her ways are pleasant ways, and all of her paths are of peace.

14.      Mishnah Pesachim 1:2

אין חוששין שמא גררה חולדה מבית לבית וממקום למקום דאם כן מחצר לחצר ומעיר לעיר אין לדבר סוף:

We are not concerned that a rodent may have dragged leaven from house to house or place to place, for then from yard to yard and city to city – there would be no end to the matter!

15.      Talmud, Yoma 30a

אמר רב פפא: צואה במקומה, אסור לקרות קריאת שמע. היכי דמי? אי דנראית, פשיטא! אי דלא נראית, לא ניתנה תורה למלאכי השרת!

Rav Pappa said: If feces is on the spot where it emerges from the body, one may not recite Shema.

What is the case? If it is visible, this is obvious! If it is not visible, the Torah was not given to the ministering angels!

16.      Nachmanides, Laws of Niddah 9:25

ומדיני החציצה: לא טוב היות האדם מחמיר יותר מדאי ומחפש אחר הספיקות לפסול טבילתה בדבר הקל, כי אם כן אין לדבר סוף... לא יכניס אדם ראשו בספיקות החמורות אשר אין להן קץ וסוף, כגון עצמה עיניה ביותר קרצה שפתותיה ביותר ומשאר הספיקות, כי מי יוכל להבחין בין עצמה ביותר ובין לא עצמה ביותר.

Among the laws of chatzitzah: It is not good to be overly strict, seeking doubts to disqualify her immersion for a light reason, for there would be no end to it… One should not insert his head into serious, interminable doubts, such as whether she closed her eyes too much or pursed her lips too much or other doubts, for who could evaluate whether she closed them too much or not?

17.      Deuteronomy 22:26

וְלַנַּעֲרָ לֹא־תַעֲשֶׂה דָבָר אֵין לַנַּעֲרָ חֵטְא מָוֶת כִּי כַּאֲשֶׁר יָקוּם אִישׁ עַל־רֵעֵהוּ וּרְצָחוֹ נֶפֶשׁ כֵּן הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה

You shall do nothing to her; the girl has no fatal sin. This is like someone who has been attacked and murdered.

18.      Talmud, Avodah Zarah 4b-5a

א"ר יוחנן משום ר"ש בן יוחאי: לא דוד ראוי לאותו מעשה, ולא ישראל ראוין לאותו מעשה; לא דוד ראוי לאותו מעשה... אלא למה עשו? לומר לך, שאם חטא יחיד - אומרים לו: כלך אצל יחיד, ואם חטאו צבור - אומרים להו לכו אצל צבור.

Rabbi Yochanan cited Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai: David was not suited for that deed, and Israel was not suited for that deed [the Golden Calf]… Then why did they do it? To teach you that if someone sins, we tell him, "Go to the individual." And if a community sins, we tell him, "Go to the community."

19.      Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 936

[T]he McDonald’s test is useful: “Is doing this the same as going to McDonald’s and eating a bacon cheeseburger?” Often this can help the person gain perspective about the reality of what they are being asked to do. They are not being asked to sin, but rather to tolerate a small (and halachically permissible) possibility that they may sin.

20.      Talmud, Berachot 17b

כיון דכולי עלמא עבדי מלאכה ואיהו לא קא עביד - מיחזי כיוהרא

[Regarding a personal stringency to avoid work on Tishah b'Av, in a place where the community normally does work:] Since everyone does work, and he does not do work, this will appear like self-righteous arrogance.

21.      Rabbi Shabbtai haKohen, Pilpul b'Hanhagat Hora'ot b'Issur v'Heter, Rule 9

כשם שאסור להתיר את האסור כך אסור לאסור את המותר... מפני שעל הרוב יש בו צד הקל במקום אחר...

Just as one may not permit the prohibited, so one may not prohibit the permitted… because generally, this will cause a leniency in some other area…

22.      Talmud, Bava Kama 91b

מאן תנא דשמעת ליה דאמר: אין אדם רשאי לחבל בעצמו? ... האי תנא הוא, דתניא: אמר ר"א הקפר ברבי, מה ת"ל: וכפר עליו מאשר חטא על הנפש? וכי באיזה נפש חטא זה? אלא שציער עצמו מן היין.

The view that says one may not harm himself matches the view of R’ Elazar haKappar BeRebi, who said: “Why does the Torah say that the Nazirite must bring an offering to atone for the sin he committed ‘against a life?’ Against whose life has he sinned?! It is because he pained himself by withdrawing from wine.”

23.      Psalms 2:11 and 100:2

עִבְדוּ אֶת־ד' בְּיִרְאָה וְגִילוּ בִּרְעָדָה:

עִבְדוּ אֶת־ד' בְּשִׂמְחָה בֹּאוּ לְפָנָיו בִּרְנָנָה:

Serve Gd with reverence, and rejoice in trembling.

Serve Gd with joy, come before Him with song.

24.      Rabbi Yaakov Kanaievsky, Etzot v'Hadrachot pg. 55, as cited at OHEL above

Such thinking is a tactic of the yeitzer hara in order to make observance of the mitzvos so burdensome that he will eventually, G-d forbid, shirk the yoke of the Torah.

25.      Rabbi JM Grinwald, Etzot v'Hadrachot pg. 85, cited by Greenberg/Shefler Ultra-Orthodox Rabbinic Responses to Religious Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Israeli Journal of Psychiatry and Related Sciences 45:3 pg. 186

[T]he person who, whenever he performs the will of the Creator, finds his soul and his energies contorted by feelings of discomfort, fear, tension and misery over the carrying out of the commandment — and, on the contrary, this is his usual state, and to carry out commandments out of joy is the exception — this then is clear proof that this was not God’s intention. For “strength and joy are in His place” (Chronicles I 16:27), meaning that the essence of performing commandments is joy, as Maimonides wrote…

26.      Yirah Tehorah pg. 18

אמנם נודע לנו גם מן המציאות וגם מאנשים העוסקים הרבה בסוגיא שלא היה אדם מעולם שפסקו אצלו הנערוון מאליהם אם לא שהכריזו כנגדם מלחמת חרמה מלחמת קודש!... גם המזניח הענין מחמת עצלותו בשב ואל תעשה "חבר הוא לאיש משחית"! מפני שהורס לעצמו לגמרי צורת התפלה.

In truth, it is known to us, from experience and from those who are very involved in the field, that no one ever had the nerves halt on their own, without them declaring a war of destruction, a sacred war!... Also, one who neglects the issue due to laziness, failing to act, "is a colleague to the destructive person (Proverbs 28:24)"! He destroys for himself, entirely, the structure of prayer.

27.      Rabbi Yisrael Ganz, cited in Religious Compulsions and Fears pg. 132

In cases that come before you regarding sufferers of religious compulsions, I think it is important to recall that which the gedolei Yisrael, such as the Steipler Rav, ztvk"l, and the gaon, Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach, ztvk"l, and others, have opined on this matter, that in every case of doubt in the halachah, one is to decide on the lenient side of the question. Likewise, even if it is unclear whether there is a doubt, one is also to be lenient…

28.      Rabbi Yaakov Kanaievsky, Etzot v'Hadrachot pg. 45, cited by Greenberg/Shefler Ultra-Orthodox Rabbinic Responses to Religious Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder pg. 185

It is forbidden to give him reasons or explanations, for every reason that he is given, he will undermine to contradict and reject completely whatever he was told.

29.      Rabbi Dr. Avigdor Bonchek, Religious Compulsions and Fears pp. 135-136

If, on the other hand, he does not think there is any problem with the bedikah, he should not give her an outright heter. He should say something along the lines of: "I don't answer such questions." She will pressure him to be more specific, but he should not budge from his one-sentence, non-committal answer. The rav should warn the woman before any questions come up that he will be giving her this kind of answer to her questions, so she should not think he is just being impatient or uncaring. He should not reassure her that the bedikah is clean; it is not to her benefit.

30.      Huppert/Siev/Kushner, Treating Scrupulosity in Orthodox Jews, J. of Clinical Psych 63:10 pg. 938

Ultimately, patients need to be willing to engage in the exposure and accept the uncertainty about whether it is permissible. The notion of accepting uncertainty and acting despite the anxiety is a guideline not only for a given exposure, but also for how OCD patients must live in general.

31.      Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski, Foreword to Religious Compulsions and Fears pg. 16

[A]n OCD sufferer may not necessarily be reassured by the opinion of the poskim. One woman with OCD threw out three sets of dishes because she could not accept the Rav's ruling that the dishes were perfectly kosher, saying, "The Rav did not understand my she'eilah."

Judaism and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Part 1

I expect to offer a shiur on Judaism and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder on Monday night, and so I've been immersed in reading on the topic for a while. I'm posting my source sheets here, but there is a lot, so I expect to do it in three parts. Some of this won't make sense without the actual shiur, but some of it may help someone.

Here is Part 1:

What is OCD?

1.   Obsessions: Recurrent, persistent thoughts, impulses or images that are experienced as intrusive and inappropriate, causing marked anxiety or distress. They are excessive and unreasonable, not grounded in reality, and a product of one's own mind rather than someone else's conditioning.

2.   Compulsions: Repetitive behaviours that a person feels driven to perform in response to the obsession, to resolve and quiet the worries by preventing some dreaded event or situation, but that are an unrealistic or excessive response to the situation.

3.   Treatment approaches

·         Medication

·         Psychoanalysis

·   Behaviour Therapy – Includes Exposure and Response Prevention, Emotional Habituaiton, Response Repetition

·         Cognitive Therapy – Includes Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Guided Imagery

·         Cognitive Behaviour Therapy

Linking OCD and Religion – Scrupulosity, Theomania, The Doubting Disease

4.   Obsessions include:

·         Fear that one has sinned, or will sin

·         Fear that one has taken a vow with some thought, to engage in some action

·         Fear of blasphemous or immoral thoughts

·         Fear that Gd is punishing or will punish them or others because of this person's inadequacies.

5.   Compulsions include:

·         Hyper-attention to the words of prayer, and to establishing proper concentration for prayer

·         Hyper-concern about washing one's hands and cleaning other parts of one's body, as in for prayer

·         Hyper-concern about dietary law, but specifically in the area of cleanliness

·         Hyper-concern about questioning Gd's existence and desires

The Relationship between Religion/Judaism and OCD

6.   Joseph W. Ciarrocchi, The Doubting Disease: Help for Scrupulosity and Religious Compulsions, pg. 8

A superficial view may lead an observer to conclude, as do some mental health professionals, that religion is the source of scrupulosity. After all, a scrupulous man obsesses about sinning if he feels attracted to a pretty woman only because he believes this constitutes "committing adultery in his heart." The superficial view fails to distinguish between religion causing the disorder from religion as its background. Religion does not cause scrupulosity any more than teaching someone French history causes him to believe he is Napoleon. All human beings exist in some cultural context… Cultural backgrounds provide the scenery around which emotional problems create the drama…

7.   David Greenberg and Eliezer Witztum, Current Treatments of OCD Chapter 10, pg. 175

It may be suggested, in summary, that obsessions of OCD appear to mirror the prevalent habits and values of a culture. Religious symptoms are common in OCD in cultures in which religious practice and ritual are important. It appears that if a topic is dealt with scrupulously in everyday life, then it is a likely focus for the symptoms of OCD that will emerge in that culture.

8.   David Greenberg and Eliezer Witztum, Current Treatments of OCD Chapter 10, pg. 176

OCD symptoms of a religious nature are not found in all areas of ritual, nor necessarily in the areas of ritual most hallowed by the religion. In our experience with religious Jewish patients, for example, Sabbath observance is a very important feature of religious life associated with many detailed laws but does not appear frequently among the religious obsessions of OCD in our clinic. However, cleaning the perianal region before prayer gets one line in the footnote of a latterday code of Jewish law, but this ritual presents often in patients with OCD in our practice. The presentation of OCD in a religious context is less typically religious than it is classically obsessive-compulsive…

9.   Religion's potential contributory role

·         Legitimizing obsessions – Thought-Action Fusion; Minutia; Punitive Gd; Flawed humanity

·        Complicating diagnosis – Is it religion or OCD?; Blaming bad training

·  Challenging treatment – Accepting secular aid; ERP challenges; Distrust for treatment; Clergy cooperation

10.      OHEL, Totally Engrossed: Extreme Piousness or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?

The key question to ask a religious person who is irrationally scrupulous about religious matters, is: "Are your chumros enhancing your religious development or impinging upon it?" Herein lies the answer. A person who davens an exceedingly long Shemoneh Esrei may merit the same heavenly assistance that allowed the Chassidim Harishonim to be involved in davening for nine hours a day while still mastering Torah study (as described in Gemora Berachos). He then is not suffering from any mental dysfunction. A person who is just repeating words over and over again, however, and feels frustrated and depressed by this imprisoning ritual, will not grow in his religious observance and is victim of mental illness, not piety. This person needs treatment. 

11.      Dr. David Greenberg's test (Current Treatments of OCD Chapter 10, pg. 180)

·         Compulsions transcend requirements of religious law

·         Compulsions have a narrow focus on one area of religious experience

·         Compulsions focus on something that is trivial to religious practice, but normal for OCD

·         Compulsions cause the patient to ignore, or to be unable to fulfill, other areas of religious law

·         The patient repeats actions because of doubt, where law would not require it.

Best Purim Costume

Definitely the ideal Purim mascot, a latter-day King Achashverosh... our very own...

Mayor Rob Ford! 

Too bad I only thought of it on Shabbos Erev Purim...

Shul Kavvanah Cards, for Purim

I know a few people who carry pre-printed cards in shul, to hand to those who try to converse with them during davening. The notes are meant to explain their owner's silence in a polite way.

In the spirit of Purim, here are a few that I've thought of; they may have too much snark to be handed out, but I had fun thinking of them, anyway [click to enlarge]:

What can you come up with?

Drinking on Purim

I know I have readers who dislike the annual post on the theme of Drinking on Purim. Sorry.

Not.

On Purim we celebrate the ultimate joy of a sudden national rescue, and our sages have taught that we should imbibe alcohol at the Purim Seudah as part of this celebration. Just as we abstain from various foods and from drink at certain times of the year to induce sadness, so we indulge in various foods and in drink at other times of the year, to induce joy. The gemara’s standard for imbibing is to drink until we cannot tell the difference between “Cursed is Haman” and “Blessed is Mordechai” (Megilah 7b).

Authorities differ on how much to drink, but the following is clear: An adult who is medically, psychologically and emotionally able to drink, and who has a designated driver, should drink some amount of alcohol - preferably enough that he will feel lightheaded (Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 695:2). One should enjoy his Purim meal relatively early in the afternoon, drink a little, and then sleep off the effects of the alcohol.

Many people, and I include myself in this number, have embraced the practice of drinking minimally at the Purim Seudah and then fulfilling the state of intoxication by taking a nap after the meal. This approach is sanctioned by the Rama (Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim 695:2). One might consider doing the eating/drinking/nap before participating in a communal seudah.

I know the following is obvious, and I apologize for taking your time with it, but if my blog has any reach at all then I feel an obligation to state this obvious point. Please:

1) There is no reason to give alcohol to minors who are pre-bar mitzvah to drink on Purim. It is not necessary for their fulfillment of any mitzvah. The practice might be secularly legal as sacramental wine - consult an attorney - but it is a foolish and dangerous ritual and therefore prohibited as endangering our children as well as violating our obligation of chinuch for our children.

I do believe there is a difference between giving children under the age of obligation in mitzvot a taste of wine from the formal Shabbat Kiddush (not the one in shul; I mean the one at dinner/lunch!) and engaging them in Purim drinking. The former is a formal setting, and no one (I hope) is drinking to get a buzz. On Purim, though, because the general drinking is more loose and more geared toward celebration, I believe that the rule should be that children drink no alcohol at all.

2) If your own child is a minor, but older than bar mitzvah, and able to handle a small amount of wine, then it makes sense to help your child fulfill the mitzvah with a small amount, in a supervised setting, assuming this is legal in your jurisdiction.

3) I believe adults should not drink on Purim in the presence of young children, beyond what would normally be consumed at a meal on Shabbat. As I see it, immature children cannot tell when we are in control and when we are not, cannot comprehend the dangers associated with alcohol, cannot accept the idea that adults can do what children are not permitted to do, and cannot understand the difference between Purim and the rest of the year.

As the Rambam writes (Hilchot Megilah 2:17), the finest joy is a celebration which centers around a mitzvah. This is the essence of Purim – the four mitzvot (Megilah, Sending Gifts of Food, Giving to the Poor and having a Feast) which are about experiencing joy and spreading joy to others and thanking HaShem for saving us from destruction.

I apologize for wasting anyone’s time by stating the obvious, but as I said above, I feel the responsibility of stating this in any forum I have available.

And not to be a party-pooper at all, but those who want to know more about this theme should see Shaarei Teshuvah of Rav Chaim Margaliyot (printed with a standard Mishneh Berurah), in his final comment on Orach Chaim:

ויותר יש לזרז עצמו בד"ת במקום שיש שם איזה שמחה אף אם היא שמחה של מצוה ועיין בסוף סוכה בענין שמחת בית השואבה וכן מבואר לעיל סימן תקכ"ט אדם אוכל ושותה ושמח ברגל ולא ימשוך בבשר ויין ובשחוק וקלות ראש לפי שאין השחוק וקלות ראש שמחה אלא הוללות וסכלות ולא נצטוינו על הוללות וסכלות אלא על שמחה שיש בה עבודת היוצר עכ"ל והוא לשון רבינו הרמב"ם ז"ל והמפרשים ז"ל פירשו לשחוק אמרתי מהולל ר"ל שיהיה באיזה ענין שיהיה השחוק הוא הוללות עבט"ז לעיל
אך לשמחה מה זו עושה ר"ל שלענין שמחה אין להחליט שאינה יפה שבאמ' יש שמחה של מצוה ולכן יש ליתן לב לדעת מה זו עושה ר"ל מה טובה אם הוא שמחה של מצוה או לא אך הואיל ואפשר כי מתוך אכילה ושתיה והוללת יתמשך לשחוק וקלות ראש לכן יקח תבלין לבסם השמחה בד"ת וחדוות ה' יהיה מעוזו ויטב לבו בד"ת וז"ש וטוב לב משתה תמיד

It is even more necessary to energize one’s self with words of Torah in a place where there is joy, even if it is joy associated with a mitzvah. See the end of Succah regarding simchas beis hashoevah. And so is explained in the Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 529, “One should eat, drink and be happy on the holiday, but not draw himself after meat and wine and laughter and lightheadedness, for laughter and lightheadedness are not joy, but empty celebration and foolishness. We are not instructed in empty celebration and foolishness, but in joy which includes service of the Creator.” This is a citation from the Rambam.
The sages explained the verse (Kohelet 2:2), “I have called laughter ‘empty celebration’” to mean that in any form, laughter is empty celebration. See the Taz earlier. [I don’t know which comment from the Taz he means.]
But “What does joy accomplish (Kohelet 2:2)” means that regarding joy, one should not conclude that it is not good. In truth, there is joy associated with mitzvot! Therefore, one should set his heart to know what joy can accomplish, meaning, what is its nature – is it joy associated with a mitzvah, or not. But since it is possible that one will be drawn to laughter and lightheadedness as a result of eating, drinking and empty celebration, therefor, one should take spices to sweeten the joy with words of Torah, and his strength will be in the joy of Gd, and his heart will be good with words of Torah. This is the meaning of ‘One of good heart is always at a feast.’

May we have wonderful and safe Purim - ליהודים היתה אורה ושמחה וששון ויקר!

7 Adar, once again

And here we are again at the 7th of Adar, Moshe Rabbeinu's birthday and yahrtzeit. Like every year, I found myself thinking a lot about Moshe in the leadup to this day.

I've thought about Moshe in different ways over the years (see here and here and here, for example), but here's a new angle, tied to Herman Wouk's The Caine Mutiny. When, at the end of the book, Willie Keith assumes command of the Caine, Wouk describes it thus:

Even at anchor, on an idle, forgotten old ship, Willie experienced the strange sensations of the first days of a new captain: a shrinking of his personal identity, and a stretching out of his nerve ends to all the spaces and machinery of his ship. He was less free than before. He developed the apprehensive listening ears of a young mother; the ears listened on in his sleep; he never quite slept, not the way he had before. He had the sense of having been reduced from an individual to a sort of brain of a composite animal, the crew and ship combined. (pg. 520, 2003 paperback edition)

The description resonates, from my shul rabbi days. Back then, I lived as part of the community, feeling that kind of responsibility for each individual, each family, each of the community's institutions. [It is, probably, the element of the rabbinate I miss most; as I have said on other occasions, leaving the shul rabbinate narrowed me as a person, painfully. But I digress.]

In thinking about Wouk's words, I wonder what it was like for Moshe when he took command of the Jewish people. Not when he first approached Pharaoh in Egypt, when the Jews' day-to-day existence was governed by Egyptian society. Not when he summoned the plagues, when the Jews still received food and water via Egyptian mechanisms, living in Egyptian homes, using Egyptian public facilities. But when the Jews finally broke away from the Egyptian infrastructure, and Moshe became fully responsible for their well-being. What was that like?

It occurs to me that Moshe's initial moments of solo leadership came when the Jews made their three-day journey to the Sea, and his first crisis was when they found the Sea in their way, and the Egyptians coming up behind them. This was the moment when Moshe became the leader of the Jews.

At that juncture (Shemot 14:15), HaShem turned to Moshe and said, "מה תצעק אלי? Why call out to Me?" And, of course, we wonder: The text does not mention Moshe calling out to Gd; only the people called out to Gd. Why does Gd address this to Moshe?

I've addressed this problem before (here, for example), but here is a new thought: Perhaps Moshe did not call out, but Moshe did as he had always done before – he waited for Gd to lead. Gd was the commanding officer, and Moshe was the exec who would carry out the Divine order. And so HaShem said to Moshe, "Why are you waiting for Me? It's your ship now, you are the commander. Time for you to take charge."

In which case the next words that Gd speaks, "Speak to the Children of Israel, and they will travel," are not so much a command, as a laying out of the facts: When you tell them, the Jews will travel. You are now in charge."

What did that moment feel like for Moshe? How frightening was it, even with Divine miracles, to become the human being upon whom millions relied? How broadening, how enervating, how invigorating, how terrifying, how empowering and how crushing... How large and how small do you feel, Moshe, standing between the Sea and such an overwhelmingly large mass of needy human beings? Twelve tribes of people who were third-generation slaves but who yet retained a memory of their saintly ancestors, Avraham and Sarah? People who had suffered bitterly, who had been whipped and tortured and murdered? What is the experience of connecting to all of those people, at once?

Did you know beforehand that this was coming, that there would be a moment when you would be handed the keys and told to drive the bus? And once it did happen, how did you not feel overwhelmed by the sheer numbers, and by the needs that persist even in a world where bread comes from the skies and water from a stone?

Did it become easier when you added elders, or did that just add another layer of responsibility? Or did it all become "normal" at some point? Did that "normal" perhaps become shaken when you faced leadership crises, as in Korach's rebellion?

Are all of these questions meaningless, when you had Gd with you? Or did the Eye looking over your shoulder make the challenge even greater?

So many questions; Moshe remains unfathomable to me.

יהי זכרו ברוך.

Warning: "Death Notification" phishing email

I just received a new variation on the standard phishing email, and it's sophisticated enough that I'm posting this warning about it. Here's what the email looks like [adjusted to fit the blog's space], although I have disabled the link:

Hubbell      Simply Compassionate
Death notification
		We would like to express our deepest sorrow for the untimely death of your beloved friend and inform you about the life service celebration that will take place at Hubbell Funeral Home on March 7, 2014 at 2:00 p.m. Please follow this link to get funeral invitation. Please be there to honor the memory of your friend with her closest people. Our best wishes and prayers, Benjamin Booker, Funeral home assistant
99 North Indian Rocks Road | Belleair Bluffs, Florida 33770 Phone 727-584-7671 | Fax 727-584-1073

The subject line says "Death Notification" and the sender, in my case, was "Hubbell Funeral Home", info@williamsfoundation.info.

A few things flag this as phony - the language is a bit stilted, and the timing of the email is odd, and the lack of the loved one's name - but I could easily see this one fooling people into clicking the link.

A time to be silent, and a time to speak up

A thought on Parshat Vayikra:

Our parshah takes a strong stand in favour of confidentiality. The opening verses relate, “And G-d called to Moshe, and G-d spoke to him from the Tent of Meeting, to go tell. Speak to the Children of Israel, and tell them…” Troubled by the doubled “go tell,” our sages explained that the duplication teaches us, “that one may not repeat something told to him, unless he is told, ‘Go tell.’“ (Talmud, Yoma 4b)

Certainly, the need for confidentiality is clear; as Sefer haChinuch (mitzvah 236) notes, gossip causes quarreling and strife. However, we might be forgiven for wondering why G-d personally violated this principle. When three visitors informed Avraham that his wife Sarah would birth a baby, Sarah overheard, and laughed. She said, “After I have been worn out, will I be rejuvenated? And my master is old!” G-d then asked Avraham, “Why did Sarah laugh, saying, ‘Can it be that I will give birth? And I am old!’ Is anything beyond G-d?... “ (Bereishit 18:12-14) Why did G-d fail to honour His principle of confidentiality?

We might gain some understanding by studying a conflict between a halachic obligation and the Rules of Professional Conduct (2000) of the Law Society of Upper Canada, regarding permission to break confidentiality.

According to the Law Society’s Rule 2.03(3), “Where a lawyer believes upon reasonable grounds that there is an imminent risk to an identifiable person or group of death or serious bodily harm, including serious psychological harm that substantially interferes with health or well-being, the lawyer may disclose, pursuant to judicial order where practicable, confidential information where it is necessary to do so in order to prevent the death or harm, but shall not disclose more information than is required.” Two points are worth noting here: (1) The lawyer may break confidentiality to  prevent serious harm to health, but not to prevent financial loss; (2) Even regarding saving a life, the lawyer may inform, but is not required to do so.

Contrast this with the Rambam’s position (Sefer haMitzvot, Lo Taaseh 297); he warns against “weakness” in rescuing from “danger of death or financial loss.” Based on the Talmud (Sanhedrin 73a), Rambam includes financial loss as grounds for action, and views intervention as a requirement. Therefore, modern halachic authorities rule that one must break confidentiality in order to save a person from physical or financial harm. [See Chafetz Chaim, Rechilut 9. Note: A discussion of endangering a career to avert another person’s financial or physical harm is beyond the scope of this article.]

The Law Society honours confidentiality over rescue because Ontario law does not require any individual to save any other individual from harm, unless a special relationship of caring for the victim already exists. In contrast, as explained by Rambam, halachah does require that we rescue others. Therefore, our responsibility to look after each other overrides our great respect for privacy and confidentiality.

This duty to rescue may explain why G-d spoke with Avraham about Sarah’s laughter: G-d broke confidentiality to rescue Sarah from denial of Divine omnipotence. As we see in numerous mitzvot, such as tochachah and lifnei iver, the Torah requires intervention to save a person from spiritual harm. Therefore, G-d spoke with Avraham. Avraham was already well-established as the Divine messenger; from the moment when Avraham and Sarah journeyed to Canaan (Bereishit 12:1), to their move to Chevron (ibid. 13:14), to the re-naming of Sarah (ibid. 17:15),    G-d issued each instruction to Avraham,  and Avraham relayed it to Sarah. Admittedly, the choice of Avraham as prophet is confusing, given that G-d told Avraham that Sarah possessed greater insight and he was to follow her word. (ibid. 21:12) Nonetheless, Avraham is the prophet, and G-d breaks confidentiality in order to have His prophet educate His people.

The combination of our parshah’s imperative for confidentiality, and our duty to rescue, precipitates a difficult decision: Do we err on the side of confidentiality, or on the side of rescue? Even if we conceal the worst, as G-d did in relaying Sarah’s speech, how do we decide whether it is a time to be silent, or a time to speak? (Kohelet 3:7)

We might apply five rules offered by the Chafetz Chaim (Rechilut 9:2):

• Make certain that the danger you wish to avert is real and substantive;

• Do not exaggerate;

• Act to help the victim, not to harm the other;

• Seek other methods of rescue first;

• Avoid language which could cause collateral damage to the subject.

May we always honour our duty to rescue, but with a firm commitment to our parshah’s value of confidentiality.

Chillul HaShem on the road

Judgmental rant coming, I apologize.

I know that people are in a rush, and therefore they allow themselves, at times, a bit of sloppiness on the road. A slow roll through a Stop sign; going through a light on the yellow-turning-red; pretending you arrived at the four-way stop before another car that's waiting at the intersection. I've done some of that too, unfortunately. But if you are going to do it, let it be rare, and not a policy, for the sake of everyone's safety.

And if you are going to brand your car as Jewish-owned by posting a magnet proclaiming that your child attends a Jewish school, then you really might think twice before driving this way.

Driving home behind you the other day as you rolled right through three Stop signs, and took a light that was red before you entered the intersection, and chattered away on your cell phone the entire time, I could only wonder what other drivers were thinking. Even if you really can do all of this without endangering anyone, and even if you think that the halachic recognition of dina d'malchuta [the law of the land] doesn't apply to traffic laws, surely you will admit the chillul HaShem [desecration of Gd's Name] involved?

Not to mention - what sort of general manners, and driving manners, do you think that this child, student at a Jewish school, is learning from you?