[Haveil Havalim is here, at the inestimable Jack's Random Thoughts!]
I'm not sure what to do with this item; I'm putting it out here for your thoughts.
Bengals win for 'Coach Zim'
BALTIMORE -- Cincinnati Bengals linebacker Keith Rivers called Mike Zimmer "amazing."
Safety Chris Crocker said it was unbelievable how much his defensive coordinator showed he cared about the team just by showing up for Sunday's game.
Bengals coach Marvin Lewis also carried a heavy heart and said there were no words to describe the emotion of what his team had just overcome.
It was yet another intriguing Sunday in "Bengaldom" as Cincinnati took sole possession of first place in the AFC North with a 17-14 victory over the Baltimore Ravens.
The game marked the fifth consecutive thriller for the Bengals (4-1). But the big win was only a backdrop for the heartbreaking situation involving Zimmer, whose wife, Vikki, passed away late Thursday.
Zimmer certainly didn’t have to be in Baltimore Sunday.
According to Lewis, Zimmer went back and forth before choosing to travel with the team. The decision worked out well as Zimmer called a terrific game and the Bengals picked up their biggest win of the season.
I can't comment on this specific case, of course. I don't know the man; I don't know the circumstances of his wife's death; I don't know his culture; I don't know his devotion to, and relationship with, his team and his sport and his livelihood. In short, I don't know anything about this case, and I do know that people mourn differently, so I can't make any productive assessment.
More than that:
I can easily see that being with his team might provide the greatest consolation.
I can easily see that his wife might have asked, or even told him, to do this.
I can easily see that this might be a way to shift focus; perhaps his wife was ill for a long time, and this was his first chance to get away from that.
And it's not as though he was partying; he went to work, in an intense, focused environment.
But this practice - going to work, and in a sporting event (although: is it a 'sporting event' for the coaches?), just days after a spouse's death - just bothers me.
Maybe it's because I view the mourning period as being about more than consolation. Maybe it's because I view mourning as a religious experience. Maybe it's because I am a product of my own cultural milieu. Don't know.
What say you - not really about this case, but about mourning in general?