Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Just a joke

[First, and most apropos: Straight from the laugh factory in Vilna, from Modern Uberdox]

I needed to write a column for Toronto Torah and wanted to build off the following joke, but I couldn't come up with a dvar torah that would fit the column and I was up against a deadline, so I went in a different direction. Rather than waste the joke, though, here it is:

Jonathan travelled from Vancouver to England for a business trip, via a series of connections. He failed to sleep on the flight from Vancouver to Winnipeg, enjoyed no success dozing off on the trip from Winnipeg to Toronto, and then found himself next to screaming twin toddlers on the flight from Toronto to London. By the time Jonathan exited Heathrow Airport in London he was desperate, so he rented a car and and parked along a side street to get a little rest.

As luck would have it, though. the quiet place Jonathan selected was on one of the city's major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there was a knock at his window. He looked out and saw a jogger.


"Excuse me, sir," the jogger said, "do you have the time?" Jonathan looked at the car clock and answered, "8:15". The jogger thanked him and left. Jonathan settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger.

"Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?"


The jogger thanked him with a smile, and left. Now Jonathan could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another one disturbed him. To avoid the problem, he put pen to paper and placed a sign in his window saying, "I do not know the time!"

Once again, Jonathan settled back to sleep. He was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window.

"Sir? Sir? It's 8:45!"

[If you feel like writing a dvar torah that uses this joke, feel free to put it in the Comments.]

And while we're at it, here's a video from a friend of mine from Allentown, whose son is one of the violinists [the one wearing glasses]. I love this - and make sure to wait for 3:23.


  1. It's a stretch, but as I heard from Rabbi Welcher regarding the mitzva of tochacha, sometimes the person doesn't realize how problematic their actions are -- then you should try to say something constructive. But a lot of other times they just don't have the strength to do anything about it -- that's the time it's best to keep quiet.

    A similar joke, I believe this is a true story -- a stuffed shirt ran to the gate, only to find that they'd just finished boarding and shut the door to the jetway. "How can you do this?! Let me on right now! Do you know who I am?! Don't you know who I am?!" He hollered at the gate agent. She calmly got on the intercom: *Attention passengers, we have a guest here who doesn't know who he is; if anyone can help him, please step forward now.*