tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post443071076208077702..comments2023-09-11T17:58:13.764-04:00Comments on The Rebbetzin's Husband: Reacting to Scandal: A guide for rabbisThe Rebbetzin's Husbandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14977193945074906534noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-14084770338310058052013-04-27T23:20:02.222-04:002013-04-27T23:20:02.222-04:00"Because majority is only used to settle a do..."Because majority is only used to settle a doubt, we have no doubt." (Remind me which Achron said this?)"<br /><br />The Tumim said this(see link):<br /><br />http://www.ou.org/ou/print_this/80455Shades of Grayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03029177164921795725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-15642473439097111412013-04-25T22:54:18.492-04:002013-04-25T22:54:18.492-04:00still4jays-
I didn't get the sense that Anonym...still4jays-<br />I didn't get the sense that Anonymous was recommending dishonesty, as much as knowing what you want to say and not letting anyone get you out of that zone.<br /><br />Mike S-<br />Good points, but I think the problem with many scandals is that teshuvah is either invisible or something long-term, and it's hard for people to feel comfortable around the rabbi because they can't identify a moment when it's "over". [Kind of like Ralbag on korbanos, actually - the korban chatas provides closure.]The Rebbetzin's Husbandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14977193945074906534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-40475016671563095612013-04-25T20:40:12.154-04:002013-04-25T20:40:12.154-04:00If you really did something scandalous do tshuvah....If you really did something scandalous do tshuvah. And publicly enough so that you are setting a good example to your congregants and the public to counteract the bad one you set.<br /><br />If the scandal is a result of your misbehavior and not everything has yet come out, get it out yourself and quickly. Do not let it dribble out bit by bit.<br />Think before you speak (this is good advise when there is no scandal too)Mike S.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-68450677244637407552013-04-25T11:13:39.373-04:002013-04-25T11:13:39.373-04:00@still4jays - עִם-נָבָר תִּתְבָּרָר; וְעִם-עִקֵּשׁ...@still4jays - עִם-נָבָר תִּתְבָּרָר; וְעִם-עִקֵּשׁ, תִּתְפַּתָּל. (tehillin 18:27). When dealing with nearly all journalists you are not dealing with someone who is trying to ascertain the truth. S/he is trying to get a soundbite or story hook at best, and at worst is trying to cause controversy and find someone to blame. <br /><br />I in no way advocated lying and certainly you can say 'no comment' but you would be better served using the platform to get your message across. <br /> Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-36546318151205397582013-04-25T06:19:11.122-04:002013-04-25T06:19:11.122-04:00I am worried by the post that provides PR advice a...I am worried by the post that provides PR advice and, in particular, with Point 4, in which the writer counsels you to "stick to your talking points...you don't have to answer the questions you're being asked." For someone like a rabbi who is in the public eye and whose character and integrity are part of the basic occupational qualifications, evading unpleasant questions is not on. You have to be prepared to address the issues frankly and head-on; equivocation or non-responsive responses make you look worse, not better. And, besides, it is fundamentally wrong to do so. Better to say candidly, "I can't answer that" than to twist your way into a canned response, in my opinion.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-27601806648192985852013-04-24T22:46:08.817-04:002013-04-24T22:46:08.817-04:00Shalom-
I see a difference between majority and Ma...Shalom-<br />I see a difference between majority and Majority. If it's 60%, I might be right. If it's 90+, I don't think so.<br /><br />Bob-<br />In my experience, the cases of 100% vs. 0% are vanishingly few. I have never found a case in which I was blamed and yet I found myself fully in the right.<br /><br />Anonymous 9:55 AM-<br />Thank you; these are valuable points.The Rebbetzin's Husbandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14977193945074906534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-14674254121292868942013-04-24T09:55:53.015-04:002013-04-24T09:55:53.015-04:001. Seek counsel. If necessary seek the assistance ...1. Seek counsel. If necessary seek the assistance of professionals. Meaning, know when to get legal help for you or the shul, know when to get PR help as well. Furthermore, call your Rebbi; get a torahdik outside perspective on the situation. <br /><br />1a. Know your legal rights and obligations<br /><br />2. Practice. Just like a fire drill. Write up a plan of action and then go through the motions of what you would do if a scandal arose. <br /><br />3. Understand the technology (see other post) know that electronic communication is both 'discoverable' legally and can often be found and posted online. Sometimes its better to speak to someone in person. <br /><br />4. Have 3 and only 3 talking points and stick to them when dealing with the media. This really gets into media training but the basic idea is that you don't have to answer the question you are being asked, think like a politician and always go back to your 3 basic points, repeat them over and over.<br /><br />5. Inform your family. The last thing you want is for someone in your family to be blindsided. Maybe this goes without saying for some, but I think it's important to mention. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-56972123707887757402013-04-24T07:59:52.195-04:002013-04-24T07:59:52.195-04:00"And if you think you are right, and the worl..."And if you think you are right, and the world thinks you are wrong, then you are outvoted and it's time to get objective counseling."<br /><br />Have you ever been genuinely right in doing some official act or making some statement, but were blamed by most others out of ignorance or malice? If so, what did you do then?Bob Millernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-10236129924114965752013-04-24T07:31:32.828-04:002013-04-24T07:31:32.828-04:00Wow, bravo.
"And if you think you are right,...Wow, bravo.<br /><br />"And if you think you are right, and the world thinks you are wrong, then you are outvoted and it's time to get objective counseling."<br /><br />Basically, Rabbi Eliezer-and-the-oven syndrome.<br /><br />What about the following?<br /><br />A. "Why don't we follow the majority and therefore Christians are right an Jews are wrong?" "Because majority is only used to settle a doubt, we have no doubt." (Remind me which Achron said this?)<br /><br />B. "Why don't we follow the majority? Because the majority is intoxicated by their evil inclination" -- R' Elchanan Wasserman, paraphrased slightly.<br /><br />C. "Isn't it yachid v'rabim, halacha k'rabim? That's only when THE Yachid -- yichudo shel olam -- is with the rabim." Yoel Teitelbaum of Satmar. (Shu"t Bnei Banim takes great issue with this view.)<br /><br />***************************************<br /><br />How about this?<br /><br />If you are innocent but you have been framed, then make every effort to prove your innocence (in a defensive manner, not attacking those questioning you); if it appears the false evidence against you in the court of public opinion is overwhelming , then quietly step down and say "there are all sorts of talents and properties a rabbi needs to fulfill his job properly; will I maintain my innocence, my reputation is not as high as is necessary to do my job."Shalom Rosenfeldnoreply@blogger.com