tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post5346454367300415782..comments2023-09-11T17:58:13.764-04:00Comments on The Rebbetzin's Husband: When children suffer – a child’s viewThe Rebbetzin's Husbandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14977193945074906534noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-64315432052890890382010-09-03T02:14:03.162-04:002010-09-03T02:14:03.162-04:00It has been my experience that we tend to underest...It has been my experience that we tend to underestimate the capabilities of children. Is it possible that this 10 year old thought this idea up by himself?<br /><br />Having been a 10 year old before I am not inclined to be concerned. As long as it doesn't cause him to harm himself or cause depression what is the big deal?Marchttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07338634487443993430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-43586089644178903202010-09-01T05:39:27.423-04:002010-09-01T05:39:27.423-04:00When I've been asked, "We don't know....When I've been asked, "We don't know..we can't understand why..." are responses that have worked, for now.<br />=============================<br />and when they get older they will understand?<br />KT<br />Joel RichAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-85979269885100783782010-09-01T00:04:29.053-04:002010-09-01T00:04:29.053-04:00I have a nine year old and eleven year old (among ...I have a nine year old and eleven year old (among others). As far as someone teaching him this concept, people often say "It should be a kapparah..." He may have heard adults talking. There may have been some sort of tragedy in his community; he may have asked why, or how could this happen, etc. and received this answer, which he then 'applied' to his stomach ahce. Kids this age ask many questions that are 'beyond their years.'(and quite uncomfortable for the parents!) If thinking this way is helpful to him in dealing with his pain (as small as it may be)or life's difficulties, maybe it's better for him to think this way, rather than trying to come up with on his own, such as possibly thinking that there is no purpose to pain or that it's a punishment. I don't think negative behaviors would be triggered in an emotionally healthy child. <br />If a child of this age asked about suffering, what would an age appropriate response be? When I've been asked, "We don't know..we can't understand why..." are responses that have worked, for now. I then try to steer the conversation toward discussing feelings, emotions, reactions.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-9050440902462983932010-08-31T22:32:20.464-04:002010-08-31T22:32:20.464-04:00R' Mordechai-
Definitely in agreement on the n...R' Mordechai-<br />Definitely in agreement on the need for prioritization, but I'm still stuck here. The idea isn't wrong, at its core. I guess I'm trying to figure out what "age-appropriate" means here.The Rebbetzin's Husbandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14977193945074906534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7898782635470765614.post-71631133684326682582010-08-31T19:53:49.161-04:002010-08-31T19:53:49.161-04:00There are a lot of simplistic presentations out th...There are a lot of simplistic presentations out there: hagiographies, chassidishe maiselach, original stories written for children and modeled on adult religious folk tales. Certainly you've seen the publications. And teachers tell these stories in school. Much of our children's religious education is based on stories that the kids don't understand. On an only slightly better note, midrashim are taught to them that way, too. There are a lot of fifth graders out there who can quote The Little Midrash Says, but can't tell you p'shat in chumash.<br /><br />When I discovered this in an elementary class I taught years ago, I stopped the use of midrash with the kids. I spent that whole year making sure they knew what is actually written in the Torah, and had some idea what to do with Rashi.Mordechai Y. Scherhttp://www.kolberamah.orgnoreply@blogger.com